


miracle

by jilylicious



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Developing Relationship, F/M, Family Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Harry Potter AU, Horny Fluff, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Light Angst, M/M, Marauders, Marauders' Era, New Year's Eve, Romantic Fluff, Strangers to Lovers, Wolfstar AU, jily, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2018-09-11 19:59:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 25,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9009850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jilylicious/pseuds/jilylicious
Summary: Remus Lupin finds himself in the middle of a snowstorm on Christmas, far away from home with a dead phone, he knocks on the door of the one house who's not celebrating Christmas and thus, Remus Lupin meets Sirius Black.





	1. reason

“For the love of _God_!”

Remus Lupin kicked the tire of his car with all the rage that had been building up in him for the past half an hour. Granted it was his fault, he hadn’t listened to what they said on the news about snow but it was Christmas and he had to get to his family or his mother would break his legs like chopsticks. Hope Lupin was a small woman but a force to be reckoned with when it came to family dinners. However, Remus’ car wasn’t afraid of Hope’s wrath, it’s tires had given up long ago but Remus had only now pulled the car over. Remus checked his phone but it was dead, too, it was a Christmas miracle that everything went so wrong. He looked around at all the pretty houses around him, all of them lit up and adorned with red and gold, laughter audible from each one except for one that was a bit down the road. The house looked beautiful but it wasn’t festive at all, the lights were on but there wasn’t anyone inside celebrating Christmas.

Remus hated asking people for help and the fact that it was Christmas night made his decision even harder, so he took a deep breath before he bowed his head down a little to keep the snow from getting to his face, it was so cold that each snowflake burned his already fragile skin.

He stood in front of the house before he knocked twice, he started cleaning the snow off of his brown coat, as he was bend over cleaning the snow from his pants the door opened and Remus made the mistake of looking up, it was a mistake because he almost fell down when he saw the ethereal creature that opened it.

“Yeah?”

“I- I’m,” mumbled Remus as he straightened himself before opening his mouth again, he saw the corner of the lip of the creature curl up. “I was wondering if I could use your phone–” 

Remus showed the dead phone in his hand to the angel that was standing before him with sweatpants on and his hair in a bun. He had pale grey eyes and the blackest hair you can imagine, his cheekbones were like stairway to heaven. He was holding a whiskey glass in his pale hands and he raised his perfectly shaped brow before inviting Remus in with a nod..

“I’m terribly sorry to bother you on Christmas, I just–”

“Do I look like I’m celebrating, mate?” interrupted the sweatpants god, he tugged a loose lock of his hair back into his flawless messy bun. “I generally learn people’s names before I let them into my house.”

“I- yeah, sorry. I’m Remus,” he replied, as he took his scarf and coat of because it was really very hot inside. “So about that phone?”

“Aren’t you in a rush Remus? Just when I was getting happy that I won’t be spending another Christmas alone,” he smiled as he showed the phone standing on a marble stand just a few feet away. “Thanks for asking by the way, I’m Sirius.”  

How could he be so thick? He forgot to ask the Greek God his name which was partly his fault because Remus literally forgot how to breathe let alone talk every time he looked at Sirius. Now that Remus thought about it, with a name like that, this man _could_ be an actual Greek God.

“I’m sorry, I was just in a rush I guess,” he said as he stared at the phone in his hands.

“Stop saying sorry for everything you do, please call who you must and tell them you are okay,” suggested Sirius as he went back to his couch right in front of a majestic chimney. “Don’t forget to tell them you will be staying with a friend because your car is not going anywhere tonight.”

Remus furrowed his eyebrows at this very brave statement but when he looked out the gigantic window right behind where Sirius was sitting, he knew he didn’t have much of a choice because it was impossible to see from the snow. It wasn’t snowing, it was like someone was cutting the clouds in half. He dialed the number with shaky hands, he knew just who would pick up.

“Hey!” he said almost crying.

“ _REMUS JOHN LUPIN!_ ” Sirius turned his head suddenly with a huge grin on his face that made Remus’ knees weak. “ _I told you months before if you missed this diner I would serve you for dinner on New Years Eve_.”

Remus could feel his cheeks warm up as he was sure Sirius could hear everything his mother was saying at the moment. 

“Yeah,mum… I’m sorry… No I’m really sorry… I will be there tomorrow I promise… I’m not _lying_ for the love of God… Yeah… Uh-huh… I got somewhere to stay I guess…”

“What do you mean _I guess?_ ” whispered Sirius from where he was sitting, he was hanging from the couch to make Remus hear him. 

“I’ll call you when I leave for home,” concluded Remus and he put the phone down with an embarrassed look on his face. He loved his mum to bits but she was sometimes a bit too much. “Can I have a charger, please?”

“Wait a second,” said Sirius as he hurriedly went to another room and came back with a charger and he placed it into Remus’ palm. His skin was almost as white as snow and he was just as cold. “We have a long night ahead Remus, do you want something to drink?”

“Tea would be gr–”

“Whiskey it is then, great choice,” teased Sirius as he went for his liquor cabinet. “This is Christmas and you are stuck here, you are _not_ drinking tea.”

He plugged his phone in spent at least half an hour trying to get to all the messages and calls that he received while his phone was dead, he knew it was rude but it was Christmas and he had a huge family he had to call.

When Remus was finally done, he went to the couch to sit down as he took the fancy glass from Sirius. He didn’t want to think about what the hell he was doing, staying at a stranger’s house was not something he would do. But this man with his hair and his cheekbones and his ridiculous smile and the way those sweatpants hang from his hips were very inviting, not that anything would happen but it was a good view at least.

“I like your mum,” said Sirius with a smirk as he took a sip from his new glass of high quality whiskey. “She’s quite something.”

“She’s worse than this snow storm on holidays,” laughed Remus. “She misses me that’s all but yeah, you heard her war cries.”

Sirius laughed and Remus heard summer in his laughter despite all the snow that was falling outside. He didn’t know why he was feeling what he was feeling but he hadn’t felt like this in forever and this was such an unnecessary thing, he really didn’t need this nor did he want this.

“So I you don’t mind me asking,” continued Remus as his throat burned from whiskey. “Why are you alone on Christmas?”

“I _hate_ my family,” replied Sirius simply, he used that word so freely, it was a bit scary. “They are bigoted, idiotically conservative and mentally abusive. I made the mistake of coming out last Christmas, it was chaos. They invited me out of obligation this year, so why bother?”

With that he tipped whatever was left in his glass into his mouth and licked his lips slowly as he walked back to the liquor cabinet and brought the bottle with him this time.

“I’m sorry about that,” muttered Remus as he did the same. He didn’t know if he should feel bad for Sirius or feel happy for himself, not that he would ever look at him like that. 

“What did I tell you about saying sorry?” smiled Sirius as he poured them more liquor. “Also, you should probably warn me when you want to sleep because I rarely sleep before 3 am.”

“Why would you ever do that to yourself?” yelled Remus, that was a bit too much but Remus never had the strongest metabolism for whiskey. “Sleep is a beautiful thing.”

_Not as beautiful as you are though._

Remus realised he should be careful about those thoughts because he was known to tell whatever was on his mind out loud.

“I can’t help it. I always work late at night and now my sleep schedule is fucked up,” he explained and cursing had never looked so good. “So Remus John Lupin, what do you do for a living?”

“I’m a TA at the university,” he replied as he ruffled his hair. “I know it’s kinda boring–”

“You are hellbent on selling yourself short,” interrupted Sirius, he loved doing that. “I bet you think you are not _good looking_.”

Remus felt like his tongue froze, what was he supposed to reply with to drunken flirting from a completely gorgeous stranger? So he did what he knows best, he changed the subject.

“So, umm, what do you do?”

“I’m an attorney, family business, but it happened so I roll with it,” he stated as he grinned. “You are _very_ good at changing the subject.”

“You heard my mum, if I don’t change the subject we talk about my sex life during dinner,” said Remus and immediately regretted it, he looked at his glass guiltily and realised that he was actually on his third glass. “I didn’t mean–”

“Another way of saying sorry, you are _incredible_ ,” teased Sirius as he put his glass down on the coffee table in front of the couch and came a little closer, Remus never thought breathing was a hard thing to do before but he could still feel Sirius’ scent, strong and spellbinding. “So, I like to think that things happen for a _reason_.”

His bloody perfect eyebrow was raised again and Remus wasn’t thinking straight so he just nodded.

“Your car didn’t break down in this street without a reason, I think Mr. Lupin, we were _meant_ to meet,” he continued, he used his hands a lot as he spoke and it was the most marvellous thing Remus had ever seen, the fact that he was already dreaming about his hands all over him was not a good sign though. “So, you are going to stay here tonight and you will leave with my number in that phone of yours, _just in case_ you need an attorney someday.”

“Okay,” whispered Remus, because that was all he could manage. “I think I should sleep because I need to wake up early tomorrow.”

“We were just starting to have fun,” mumbled Sirius but he stood up nevertheless to show Remus to his room. “Don’t be scared I won’t bite.”

_You could if you want to._

Remus followed him up the stairs trying so hard not to stare at his back but the damn sweatpants weren’t helping. Sirius showed him to a not so small guest room on the left and walked back out.

“If you feel like you can’t sleep, I’m downstairs,” he reminded with a lopsided smile and went away. 

Remus crawled into the extremely soft bed and was asleep in a matter of minutes thanks to the alcohol in his veins.

* * *

Sirius was flabbergasted by the luck he had this Christmas after everything that went down last year. A tall, lanky man with the warmest eyes was sleeping in his guest room and Sirius was still reeling from everything that happened in the past six hours since it was around 3 am at the moment. He slowly got up and turned the lights off. He climbed the stairs carefully scared that he would wake up the most beautiful man to ever enter this house besides him, when he reached the top he realised that Remus had slept with the door open. He was softly snoring and was drowning in the huge duvet over him. His clothes were on the dresser and it didn’t take long for Sirius to understand that he would kill to get in that bed at that moment. He slowly turned around to enter his own room as Remus hummed in his sleep. 

“ _This_ is what I call a Christmas miracle.”

Sirius always believed things happened for a reason, he knew things would happen in the order they should, he had had troubles with his anger as far as he can remember and this new belief was helping him deal with it sometimes, it also helped him makes sense of things like this. Sirius firmly believed that Remus walked into his life for a reason and he was intended to find out why it took so long and what it was for.

He slipped into his own bed and shivered as the cold sheets touched his skin and undid his bun to sleep comfortably. When he closed his eyes, all he could see was honey eyes, long limbs and a shy smile. For the first time in a long time Sirius Black was excited to wake up.


	2. alone

Remus opened his eyes slowly, desperate for water, he made his way out of the bed but a little noise he heard made him stop on his tracks. An angel was standing at the door and Remus was fairly sure he was still sleeping, Sirius with all his beauty and a fucking towel hanging from his hips was smiling at him. Nope, he was asleep there was no way any human being could be so perfect. It was as if God took time to carve out each one of his perfect features, you could easily eat chocolate ice cream from his collar bones and that towel.. Good God that towel was hanging so dangerously loose, Remus found himself praying for it to just fall off.

“Well, morning Remus,” said Sirius and Remus suddenly realised not only was he not dreaming but he had been staring at him for too long and also there was a not so small problem going under the blankets he was hoping Sirius wouldn’t realise.

“Morning,” he mumbled shyly trying his best to cover himself up with the big duvet.“What time is it?”

“9.30″ he replied with a smile. “Are you going to give me the pleasure of preparing breakfast for you?”

_He cooks, too?_

“Well, yeah sure, why not?” blabbered Remus as he tried to look somewhere else than Sirius’ abdomen which proved to get harder and harder every passing second. “I need to be out at 11, though. My mother would kill me.”

“You should get out of bed then,” he suggested with a raised eyebrow and Remus felt his heart trying to climb out of his mouth.

_Not when you are standing like the fucking Greek God you are and I’m here above average at best._

“I will once you shut my door please,” shot back Remus trying to look as confident as he can. “We are still _strangers_ after all.”

“But you slept at my house?”

“Difficult times require difficult choices Sirius,” he replied sarcastically with a smile and shooed him out and as he was staring at him as he turned around he realised that towel was both a blessing and a curse. He got out of the warm bed his problem long gone and got dressed in a haste as he pulled his sweater over him he heard Sirius call from downstairs.

“I’m not even bothering asking you if you prefer tea or coffee,” he yelled making Remus smile and he got out of the guest room after making the bed, that was how his mother raised him after all, and went downstairs still smiling.

“You shouldn’t. I’m guessing you are a coffee person,” speculated Remus as he sat on the chair waiting for Sirius to bring their plates, it was smelling like heaven inside the house.

They ate their food as they talked about their jobs a little more and Sirius told Remus a bit more about his family, Remus had a small urge inside him to ask Sirius something he knew was a bit too soon but he just wanted to know.

“What are you doing on New Year’s Eve?”

“Um, I’ll probably be here the same as yesterday,” answered Sirius and that was the first time he looked weak since they met. “It’s just one day turning to another, it’s not a big deal.”

“You don’t mean that,” objected Remus because Christmas was very special for him and he liked to think it was for most of the people. He was personally offended by how little Sirius thought of New Year’s Eve. “No one should be alone on New Year’s Eve.”

“Well I really don’t have much of a choice really,” he teased but Remus could hear the disappointment in his voice he tried so hard to mask with all the teasing and sarcasm. “It’s not like I can take back what happened last year and I don’t want to spend my New Year’s Eve with people who only pretend to love me out of obligation.”

“Come spend it with us,” blurted out Remus before he could stop himself.

“ _What?_ ”

“You can come spend it with us, it’s our turn this year to hold the festivities and there will be loads of people. I have kept in touch with my best friends from high school and our families are very close friends and we have a tradition–”

“I can’t,” said Sirius curtly. “It is very rude to your parents and everyone else invited. I’m alright with spending it _alone_ , Remus.”

“Think about it as a thank you for accommodating me last night,” he countered. “I won’t let you spend it alone.”

“Please let it go–”

“You said,” began Remus and took a deep breath. “You said there was a reason that we met–”

“I was _drunk_ –”

“Shut it for a second, _please_ ,” interrupted Remus, shocked at his own audacity, he ran a hand through his locks. “You said there was a reason for us to meet, what if it is for you to meet new people and find a new place you can call home?”

“We are just strangers who met because of a coincidence,” said Sirius as he picked the empty plates up.

“Drunk you is better than this _hopeless_ you,” hissed Remus as he stood up and went to the kitchen walking a little too fast. He clearly wasn’t looking where he was going as he bumped into Sirius when he entered the kitchen. They ran into each other Remus hovering over Sirius and his scent still as mesmerising as it was last night and it took a little time for both of them to take a step back and mumble an apology.

“I have just realised I’m tall enough to put you on my shoulder and carry you to my car if you refuse to come again,” challenged Remus, he didn’t know where this blind courage was coming from but he was liking it, it was like a good side effect of Sirius. “Please?”

“You should call and ask your mother first really,” said Sirius as he gave up and Remus bolted to his phone and called his mother as fast as he could.

“Hi mum… yes I’ll be leaving in five minutes. I was wondering if I can bring someone with me… Yes, yes that’s the one… No he’ll be spending it alone..”

“ _ALONE?! ON NEW YEAR’S EVE? YOU BRING HIM HERE OR SO HELP ME GOD_ ”

“I will mum, God… okay love you, too. See you in an hour.” 

Remus turned around to see Sirius’ reaction to his mother’s yelling and he was staring at a grinning Greek God.

“I think I love her,” said Sirius as he put the plates and the mugs in the dishwasher. “Let me take a few things. I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

“We both did weird things the past 24 hours, what’s life without a little risk?”

Remus didn’t believe what he was hearing himself say, when did he start living so reckless? Sirius came back with a small duffel bag and he was smiling like he wasn’t believing what he was about to do either.

“I just realised I don’t even know your last name,” said Remus.

“It’s Black,” replied Sirius as he pulled the door behind him. “It suits my soul pretty well.”

“If you say so,” he snickered before he turned left to walk towards his car. The roads were cleared and it was beginning to look a lot like Christmas even though it was over.

* * *

_I’m in a stranger’s car, going God knows where, mother wouldn’t approve. All the more reason to do this._

They were driving slowly to their destination with the AC on so they wouldn’t freeze. Remus was playing Queen songs on shuffle and Sirius’ Christmas miracle was getting better and better. 

“We are lucky they cleared the snow from the streets because I didn’t bother getting snow tires,” stated Remus as he stared at the road, his eyes squinted a little. “Mum will probably drown you with food, please don’t try to be polite and say no when you want to.”

“I never say no to good food Remus,” he replied. “No one in their right mind does.”

He smiled his signature warm smile that would melt icebergs and kept on staring ahead. Out of his respect for _Bohemian Rhapsody_ , Sirius kept his mouth shut but as soon as it was over he started asking all the things he had been trying to keep himself from asking.

“So who are these friends of yours that are invited?”

“Um, so James and Lily have been dating since senior year, if James gets his head out of his ass he will propose soon,” he began, there was a spark to his eye he knew Regulus had when he was talking about him. “Peter is an amazing cook and he is my oldest friend, I met him when we were 10 years old, I guess.”

“It must be nice to have friends like that,” said Sirius absent-mindedly. What was wrong with him? He found himself saying all the things he never said to anybody else. “I’m only close with my brother Regulus, who’s abroad at the moment. He’s studying art in Italy.”

“I’m going to force my friendship on you Sirius Black,” assured Remus as he turned and grinned at Sirius shortly. “It is easier for you to just let me in really.”

Sirius wanted to let him in so badly, he was aching for affection and love ever since his relationship with his parents and old friends went down the hill like an avalanche but he was almost sure Remus wasn’t talking about the same kind of relationship Sirius was hoping for. 

This was what the writers talked about all the time, this was the feeling Sirius made fun of all the time because love couldn’t be so sudden but here he was in the car with Remus Lupin with his old sweater, sandy locks and honey eyes, and he suddenly believed that love didn’t knock before it entered but Remus had literally knocked his way in.

_“This thing called love I just can’t handle it..”_

_Me neither, Freddie, me neither._


	3. happy misfortune

Remus pulled slowly in front of his countryside home. It wasn’t as majestic looking as Sirius’ house but it was home, it was the place Remus grew up and he loved their old place no matter what. His father had spent months renovating the place, it was old but it was as good as new. As he was trying to get the keys out, the door flew open and Hope Lupin appeared at the door her hands on either side of her hips and a frowning smile on her face. Remus knew that smile too well, she made that face when she wanted to be angry with Remus but she couldn’t find it in herself. Behind her was standing Lyall, his father, with a grin on his face as he mouthed “Be careful” to his son.

It was obvious that Remus had his father’s physique and mother’s kind and beautiful face. He got out of the car and hastily walked to his mother, he hugged her and her feet left the ground for a little while. He had missed his mother the past few months he hadn’t seen him because he had so much to do. Hope had tried to make him come home every now and then but something had came up each time. The Christmas dinner he had missed was a huge family gathering unlike New Year’s Eve where they would invite Remus’ old school friends and their families. Remus had missed the rest of his family, too, but the snow storm had kept him from coming.

“Remus Lupin, put me down,” she said firmly as she tried to stifle her laugh. “If you think I will forgive you for missing Christmas dinner just for sweeping me off of my feet, you are _wrong_.”

She had already turned around and left before Remus could come up with a smart answer, so he launched himself on his dad. After a long hug with infinite number of pats on each others backs they separated.

“It’s good to have you back, son,” smiled Lyall as he made his way back in. “Your mum could use some help in the kitchen, you know how clumsy I am.”

“Remus!” yelled Hope from the kitchen. “I thought you had a guest.”

“Oh shit,” gasped Remus. In the excitement of seeing his parents after a long while, he had forgotten Sirius was in the car and as he turned around to go back to get him, he saw that he was already coming towards them with the luggages.

“I think that’s all,” he reassured with his perfect smile before he dropped the bags at the door and extended a hand for Remus’ father to shake. “I’m Sirius Black, sir, thank you for accepting me.”

“Lupins don’t let people spend holidays alone, Sirius,” he said as he shook Sirius’ hand. “Now get in, it’s cold outside.”

They both tried to take the bags at the same time and gave each other a small concussion but laughed it off like nothing was wrong. Remus’ head was still banging as he heard his mother shout from the kitchen yet again. 

“Remus! Aren’t you going to introduce me to your _friend_ , cariad?”

“ _Welsh_?” mouthed Sirius before they entered the kitchen, he looked genuinely shocked.

“Oh,” said Hope, she probably was a little taken aback by Sirius’ beauty. “Well, hello _Sirius_ , is it?”

“Yes, ma’am,” replied Sirius politely. “Thank you for letting me come to your holiday dinner.”

“It’s our pleasure,” she smiled. Remus knew they shared that with each other, even the way their eyes squinted when they smiled was similar. “I hope you are familiar with cooking. Lyall just creates chaos in the kitchen, just like Remus, and Peter doesn’t arrive until 30th.”

“I’ll help the best I can Mrs. Lupin,” he assured and turned to Remus with his pale grey eyes. “Where should I put my bag?”

“In Remus’ room,” interrupted Hope before Remus could reply. 

“ _My_ room?”

“Yes, _your_ room. You forget there will be other people staying here,” scolded Hope as she washed a mug. “Now go and get cleaned up.”

They made their way upstairs to Remus’ old room. It was almost as big as Sirius’ guest room. It had a bed that would easily accommodate two children but only one adult, a gigantic book case in which there was numerous space related books that fed Remus’ curiosity when he was younger. There was a bed fashioned out of a pullout couch that their parents have bought back when James and Peter practically spent the summers with them.

“Sorry about this,” muttered Remus shyly as he put his own bag down. “This must seem like a death trap after your bed--”

“Why are you like this?” asked Sirius with his ridiculous eyebrow raised. “This is perfect, your parents are perfect, you are-”

Sirius suddenly seemed very interested in all the things he could see outside the window next to his bed. 

“We should go downstairs before mum comes here and drags us down from our ears,” pointed out Remus and they made a small stop at the bathroom to wash up before going downstairs for lunch. 

“I hope leftovers are alright,” said Hope in a apologetic tone.

“It sounds perfect, leftovers are better than the actual food anyways,” replied Sirius with his indescribable smile and a spark in his eyes, getting a warm smile from both Hope and Lyall in return. Remus didn’t know why but the fact that his parents seemed to like Sirius was making him really happy, but he still had the biggest test to ace. James Potter and his stupid standards but Remus wasn’t going to tell anything about this to Sirius of course, he was still very uncomfortable about coming to somewhere he was invited at the last minute.

As he ate the leftovers, Remus felt sad that he missed the actual dinner because each bite was more delicious than the other. When they were done, Lyall made them clean out the snow from the driveway.

“Bet this wasn’t what you were hoping for when you got in the car,” teased Remus as he shovelled a big lump of snow to the side. 

“It’s better actually,” grinned Sirius, his hair was in a bun but one stubborn lock was in hanging in front of his face. How was it possible that his bloody triceps were visible from all of the clothes he was wearing? Remus thought he should sign up to the same gym as him, he would probably faint the first time he saw Sirius sweat drenched but it would be worth it.

When the whole driveway was cleaned up, they made their way inside and they found two large cups of cocoa waiting for them on the kitchen counter.

“For your hard work,” explained Hope as he took their coats from them. Remus loved this cocoa ever since he was a small kid but Sirius was staring at the marshmallow filled cup with an utter disbelief on his face. “What’s wrong Sirius, dear?”

“Um, nothing, Mrs. Lupin. It’s just that I’m not used to drinking cocoa,” he replied as he freed his hair from the bun. “My mum was never the cocoa making type.”

He was smiling but even though knowing him for only two days, Remus knew that smile wasn’t genuine. He sat on the chair next to Sirius and watched him take his first sip, he was actually happy the first proper coca he ever had was Hope’s coco because it was magical and Remus could see that magic in Sirius’ expression after he swallowed that first sip.

“This is delicious!” he raved as he stared at Hope with a foam mustache.

“It’s family recipe maybe Remus will give it to you someday,” laughed Hope as she gave Sirius a napkin. “I will gladly make you loads of hot cocoa Sirius.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Lupin,” said Sirius as he caught a marshmallow with his teeth. Just as they were finishing their cocoas Lyall came in with a huge smirk on his face meaning they were not done for the day.

“We need to cut some wood,” he gushed. “Have you ever cut firewood before, Sirius?”

“No, sir, I haven’t,” said Sirius as he licked the remaining foam from his upper lip. “I genuinely think I shouldn’t be trusted with an axe though.”

“Don’t worry, it’s not as hard as it looks,” laughed Lyall before he handed them their coats. “Now, come on, that fire isn’t going to burn itself.” 

It was starting to get colder as evening came closer but wood cutting was a tiring business. Lyall was doing it like it was the easiest thing to do, but then again, he had been a carpenter his whole life. Remus was not bad at it but he wasn’t good at it either but Sirius was a complete mess. They had tried teaching him very patiently but at the end of almost two hours they had decided that he was a lost cause. 

“Let’s go inside before one of us gets pneumonia,” warned Lyall as he ushered Sirius and Remus inside. 

“Can I use the bathroom if it’s alright?” asked Sirius as he wiped the sweat from his forehead. “I could use a hot shower.”

“Remus’ bathroom is right across his room, dear,” explained Hope as he hang Lyall’s coat. “Take your time, dinner won’t be ready for another hour.”

“Thank you Mrs. Lupin.”

As soon as Sirius was out of site, Remus’ mother sat across him with a smirk on her pretty face.

“So?”

“So what?”

“Do you like him?” she asked her brows raised with excitement.

“What are you talking about mum? I _just_ met him,” he shot back trying to stop her from getting excited for nothing, how could she think that an ethereal creature like Sirius would even look at Remus that way. It was ridiculous.

“You can cut the tension between you two with a scissor, cariad,” she whispered so that Lyall wouldn’t hear. He had been very accepting of Remus’ sexuality but he still wasn’t comfortable with talking about his love life which was very understandable. “He is beautiful and kind. Don’t you _dare_ miss him.”

“I can’t force him to like me, mum,” he complained. “Have you _seen_ him? If God created the universe in six days, he created Sirius Black in _seven_.”

“Tell me,” she began, confident that whatever she will say next will almost certainly persuade Remus. “Who in the world would say yes to an invitation from a man they just met if they didn’t have hopes?”

“He’s an adventurous soul,” he countered.

“Listen to me just this once, cariad.”

“I _always_ listen to you, mum,” grinned Remus.

“Oh please, don’t make me laugh.”

* * *

 

Sirius stood frozen at the top of the stairs, as he listened to the whole conversation. He intended to ask Hope where the towels were just when she asked his son about him and he had the happy misfortune of over hearing the whole conversation which made him weak in the knees.

_Deep breaths._

Sirius almost ran into the bathroom door when he heard the mother and son get up. He went in and turned the water on, he would have to improvise the towel situation when he got out.

Time alone in shower wasn’t what he needed at all at the moment, he needed a good strong drink and not overthink what he had just heard. What did he mean by all that? Remus seems like a clever man, would he even like a man he just met a few days? But the thing he said about him being created in seven days, what was that about? Maybe Remus just finds him attractive and nothing more. 

After standing under the running hot water for what felt like days, Sirius finally stepped out of the shower and saw that there already was a clean towel for him. He wrapped the towel around his hips and walked out of the bathroom leaving a steam bath behind him.

He opened the door to Remus’ room and found himself right in front of him who was laying in his bed comfortably playing with his phone. Sirius could easily see that Remus was somewhat blushing but he just thought maybe he wasn’t very good with nudity. 

“I- I was just going to get my clothes,” he mumbled and took his clean clothes from his bag and went back to the bathroom. He got dressed quickly and cleaned the mirror so he can check himself out, if Remus was so impressed with his looks it wouldn’t hurt to look a tad bit better.

Sirius hadn’t stopped thinking about what he had heard a few hours ago. He hadn’t eaten his dinner properly because he was so consumed with the thought. He turned the conversation in his mind over and over again, wondering what Hope had told Remus when she was whispering.

After dinner, they had felt the heaviness of all the work they did that day weigh on them. Both Sirius and Remus excused themselves to go to sleep, both of them had a lot of thinking to do, neither of them knew the other was suffering, too. 

As he took his shirt off to get in his bed, Sirius took his sweet time to show himself off, he had sworn he would abuse the fact that Remus thought he was ethereal. His family might have been a nightmare compared to the Lupins but Sirius couldn’t help but feel thankful for the genetics sometimes.

“Goodnight,” murmured Remus his voice a little hoarse from fatigue and it was so beautiful Sirius almost choked on his own spit.

“Goodnight to you, too,” replied Sirius as he got in the bed and turned towards the wall to drown in his own thoughts.


	4. dreamy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _December 27th_

It was a dark alley, maybe a street behind one of Remus’ favourite bars around the university area. He looked around to see a familiar face, he wasn’t in this alley without a reason, he should really try drinking like an adult and not like a teenager that just turned 18.

He turned around to as a hand pulled him from his waist, it obviously was a shorter person but Remus didn’t particularly remember being with someone inside. When he turned around he was staring at the pale grey eyes of Sirius Black, the shorter man’s hands in the back pockets of Remus’ jeans and a grin on his face.

“What’s wrong, love?”

_Love?_

“I-- _umpf_ ”

Remus didn’t know what to say but he didn’t expect Sirius to smash his lips on his either. It was like walking into the ocean for the first time, wild but pleasant as it comes. The alleyway was cold but Remus wasn’t. It was soft and violent at the same time and Remus knew he should pull away but he was captivated and couldn’t move to save his life. Before he knew it his hands were on either side of Sirius’ hand and Sirius was biting his lower lip. Remus pushed him down a little and heard a small moan against his lips.

_How did this happen?_

Remus opened his eyes as this thought occurred in his mind and found himself staring at the ceiling of his room instead of Sirius’ dreamy eyes. He raised himself a little to check if Sirius was sleeping and found him laying on his side, his eyelashes creating a shadow on his flawless skin, sleeping like the angel he is. Remus looked at his phone to see what time it was and wasn’t very pleased when he saw that it was just past 5 am. 

He slammed his head back to his pillow with so much self anger, what was that dream about? Wasn’t Remus the one telling his mother that they had just met yesterday? Didn’t Sirius make it clear that the reason talk was just because of alcohol?

But Remus couldn’t stop thinking about what his mother told him, who would have said yes to an invitation from a total stranger if they didn’t have something else on their mind. Maybe he is a serial killer?

_Don’t be ridiculous._

Remus turned and twisted in his bed until he heard his parents get up around 8.30, it was the longest three hours he had to spend. He had this bad habit of not being able to go back to sleep once he was awake.

He went straight to the bathroom and took a cold shower to get over the lasting effect of his dream. When he got downstairs, his parents had already made tea and his father was trying to get the fireplace going.

“Morning, cariad,” said his mother softly as he hugged his son. “You are up early.”

“I couldn’t sleep,” mumbled Remus as he took a mug from the cupboard and poured himself some tea. 

“Was it because of Sirius?” asked his father as he lit a match and threw in the fireplace.

“No, why would it be because of him. it wasn’t--”

“Calm down. I just thought he snored,” laughed his father as he threw a knowing look to his son. “You should wake him up for breakfast.”

“He’ll wake up to mum’s pancakes’ smell,” assured Remus as he turned to smile at his mother. “You would make your son his favourite, wouldn’t you?“

Hope just shook his head as she reached for a big bowl to mix the ingredients.

“You and your friend are going to help me clean up the attic today, it’s that _wonderful_ time of the year,” teased his mother. There was a spare room in the attic they preferred to use as a bin during the year except for when they had guests over and it meant cleaning out three years worth of mess. 

When the batter hit the butter grazed pan, Remus knew he was home. The familiar smell was everywhere and it was so warm and delicious he could feel his mouth watering. He was sure that the smell would work as an alarm to Sirius, it had once woken up Peter from his hibernation.

As his mother put the now cooked pancakes on a serving platter, he heard Sirius walking down the stairs. 

“This place smells like Christmas,” he said then he inhaled the smell once again with a huge grin on his face. He looked like a small child on Christmas morning.

“Another secret recipe, Sirius,” replied Hope as she flipped the bubbly pancakes. “Come, sit. Did you sleep well?”

“Yes ma’am, thank you,” answered Sirius as he obeyed her. Remus got up to make him some coffee. He couldn’t find it in himself to look at him in the eyes after that stupid dream.

The breakfast went on pretty smoothly as Remus drowned himself in the pancakes and golden syrup, it wasn’t very common to have pancakes so he was pretty sure Sirius had never tasted something like this and in addition to that, Hope’s pancakes were ridiculously tasty to talk while they ate.

“Sirius I hope you are good with organising, dear,” said Hope while she proceeded to take the empty plates to put them in the dishwasher. “We have an attic to clean today.”

It wasn’t until after lunch they went upstairs and Remus avoided Sirius at all costs and he was starting to notice, this wasn’t the best way to keep him in the dark about the dream so Remus suddenly became his old self again. 

“You are weird today,” pointed out Sirius and rightfully so, he wasn’t angry or confused but he was smiling that unearthly smile doing things to Remus’ heartbeat.

_Change the subject._

“I hope you aren’t afraid of spiders, Sirius,” warned Remus before he climbed up the narrow staircase to their attic. Sirius shook his head in silence as a response and Remus somehow didn’t find that very convincing but continued nevertheless. 

There was enough storage in the attic fortunately but no one took the time to put the stuff where they belonged. The three of them were working in silence, every now and then Hope said something about where one thing should go. There was a soft music coming down the stairs, Lyall had brought out the old record player again taking turns in playing each Beatles record he owned.

It had been maybe an hour since they started moving the boxes so they would stand neatly on the corner of the room, Remus heard a high pitched scream from Sirius followed by a loud bang as he hit his head to the low ceiling very severely.

“ _OW_ ,” he bellowed just before he started whispering in panic. “Spiders!”

“I asked you _especially_ if you were scared Sirius,” complained Remus and he went to get the things to get rid of the spiders. Attic wasn’t used regularly, there were bound to be some spiders and these were the smallest kind but it was enough to scare Sirius. 

“You should go put some ice on his head,” suggested Hope with a warm smile on her face. “This place is almost done.”

“Are you sure Mrs. Lupin?”

“Stop calling me Mrs. Lupin for God’s sake and go put some ice on your head.”

They went downstairs and Remus took the pac of frozen peas out of the freezer and slowly put it where Sirius’ skin was red. As Sirius took over the peas, their hands brushed for a second and an electric surge when through Remus’ veins.

“I’m sorry about reacting so harsh,” apologised Remus. “I guess I got angry because you hurt yourself.” 

“That’s a weird emotion,” smiled Sirius while furrowing his eyebrows at the pain he was feeling.

“You’re pressing it too much, just let me do it.”

Remus took the bag of frozen peas back and gently placed it on the same place and felt relief wash over Sirius. They were sitting at the dinner table, Remus a little hunched over to be at the same level as Sirius staring into each others eyes. It was incredible how the small details in his grey eyes made it obvious that Sirius Black was no ordinary man. The bluish stains in his eyes were more visible today as he wore a white t-shirt and not black for once. It was as dreamy as he had seen in his dream.

They both jumped as the door opened and closed and Lyall walked in the kitchen. 

“So is the attic clean enough for the Pettigrews to sleep in?”

“It probably is since Remus cleaned out the _spiders_ ,” joked Sirius. 

“I don’t understand how they fit in there,” said Remus, he was still holding the pea bag to Sirius’ head. “Even a rat would hesitate to live there, it’s so small and stuffy.”

“You are being dramatic, Remus,” snickered Lyall as he opened a cold beer. “So how did you hit your head, son?”

“I may or may not have screamed when I saw spiders and jumped a little,” confessed Sirius shyly. 

“Happens to the best of us,” he laughed in return and went to the living room to sit by the fireplace. 

After his father left Remus felt anxious about forcing Sirius to come here and cut wood and clean the attic with his family. He always assumed he was doing something good but what if he was bored.

“I’m sorry if you are bored here, I know London is way better than here,” began Remus biting his lip. “There are a few pubs close by we can go to one of them tomorrow and I’ll show you around a little.”

“Firstly, I am not bored. Secondly, when will you stop apologising?” he tilted his head to the side softly smiling. “Thirdly, I would appreciate that.” 

_Why would you ever ask to take him to a pub?_

The bloody dream was still in effect apparently but Remus couldn’t help but feel excited to take Sirius out tomorrow. Well, of course, it wasn’t a date but it was a chance to get to know him better and talk comfortably without the fear of his parents interrupting them. He felt like there was so much more to Sirius Black under the flawless pale skin then he let on and he wanted to dig through his perfect skin and find every small secret he kept to himself.


	5. possibilities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _December 28th_

The pub was crowded and warm inside, they had been walking around the past hour just so Remus can show Sirius around a little but the night time was extremely cold and it was about time they went in. As they settled on a table for two they found in the far end of the pub, Remus called a waitress to order their first round. When the girl looked up at the both of them, she lost her words for a moment, Sirius Black had that effect on people.

“Uh, what can I get you?” said the girl almost as if she was choking. She was as pretty as they come but Sirius was just something else. 

“We’ll have two pints of Fosters please,” replied Remus causing the girl to finally look away from Sirius who was busy checking his phone. He put his phone on the table as he smiled to Remus.

“I was just talking to Reggie, sorry,” he apologised as he took off his black coat that looked like it cost more than Remus’ whole wardrobe. “Tonight, we get to know each other if you are going to force your friendship on me as you promised.”

“Exactly what I had in mind,” confirmed Remus. “So why is your brother in Italy during holidays, I’m sure they have holidays, too.”

“You can see the appeal of entering the New Year in Milan,” smiled Sirius but his smile didn’t reach his grey eyes. “After last year, he distance himself from our family, too. They had problems with Reggie studying art, he saw the opportunity and got away as fast as he could.”

“Well, good for him,” he said just when the enamored waitress dropped their beers. “I told you yesterday, too, but I really do hope we aren’t boring you.”

“Remus, your family is the loveliest people I have had the fortune to meet,” he began as he ran his hand through his damp hair. “Please stop pestering yourself, I am an adult and I can leave when I want to but I don’t want to.”

“I’m glad you think like that,” confessed Remus. “I don’t what I was thinking when I literally forced you to come with me.”

“Living in the moment?” laughed Sirius, his laughter filled the emptiness in Remus’ lungs and he felt like he needed it to survive. “Well, this is _way_ better than sitting at home drinking by yourself, I’ll give you that.”

“So I have a question but--”

“Ask it. _Come on_ Remus. All cards on the table tonight.”

“Oh, okay,” mumbled Remus and he took a deep breath. “How do you afford the house you are living in? I can’t afford a 1+1 in London without selling my soul.”

“Actually I make decent money at where I work,” began Sirius. “But my uncle passed away a few months ago and he left me a considerable amount in his will. I remember the look on my father’s face, it was a sight to see.” 

“I’m sorry for your loss,” said Remus as he drank the rest of his beer. “You know what this calls for? _Shots_.”

“Are you trying to get me drunk Remus?” he flirted with a smile and Remus felt the air leave his body for good.

_This should be illegal._

“Maybe,” shot back Remus bravely and saw the infamous brow of his shot up. 

“Guess we’ll have to wait and see what happens,” he whispered to himself as Remus ordered a few shots of vodka, just to have back ups. 

When they downed the first one, Remus remembered how long it had been since he had gotten properly drunk. The vodka left a trail of fire in his throat and he tried to shake it off coolly as he could but when he stared at Sirius’ shrivelled face he lost every ounce of self composure he had and started laughing uncontrollably.

“I don’t do vodka,” laughed Sirius as he tried to look normal again. “No, correction: I don’t do shots.

“But you were... so... _cute_ ,” said Remus as he tried to catch his breath. “I’m sorry but that was the most helpless face I have ever seen.”

“Are you enjoying my misery?” he teased as he licked his lips for the remainder of vodka. “Now my turn, why university and teaching?”

“Because I’m a learner and I’m really good at teaching actually,” he explained. “Also I want to get a doctorate degree. I like to think that the researches I’m a part of will help people with diseases eventually.”

“What is your area?”

“Genetics,” he replied, his head held high. Remus always had enjoyed delving into the depths of life. “It’s where our future lies actually but I’m going to bore you with why genetics is important for our survival some other day.”

“I love how passionate you are about this,” said Sirius with a smile as he pulled the second shot in front of him. “I wasn’t very passionate about being an attorney until recently.”

“Why not?”

“Because it was what my family wanted for me,” he admitted as he raised his glass. “If it was up to me, I would have strayed as far away from law as I can. At least Reggie got away.”

The familiar burn made itself less recognisable this time and Sirius’ face was a little better, there were still two more shots on the table.

“What do you say we pick up the pace a little?” added Sirius as he pushed the shot glass towards Remus with such charisma that Remus forgot how to speak so he just smiled and nodded.

Another down and it felt good, Remus felt a bit more relaxed as he called the sweet waitress girl for four more shots, if they were going down, they were going down properly. When the girl came back, she had six shots on her tray.

“One from me and one from our bartender,” she said as she put the shots down. They both looked at the bar and saw an tattoed goddess waving their way, what was it with this pub and all the pretty girls that worked there?

“Thank you,” said Sirius with a grin as she helped the girl unload the glasses.

“Okay now that we are both a little bit tipsy,” began Sirius, his eyes locked on Remus’. “How’s _love_ treating you Remus?” 

“ _Er_ , well, not good I guess,” he babbled. “It’s hard to focus on dating when I have so much work to do.”

“Love does not require _effort_ ,” countered Sirius as he once again pushed a shot glass in front of Remus.

“It looks like you are trying to get me drunk,” complained Remus as he tipped the glass and swallowed the vodka for the fourth time. Sirius put his glass down and looked at him mischievously. 

“You’ll never know, Lupin.”

“So what’s your family like?” asked Remus, it was a very intrusive question but he started not to care anymore.

“Annoying as _fuck_ ,” stated Sirius. 

_Yes please, more cursing._

“Loads of annoying traditions, stupid rules to follow and not being anything you want to be. If you don’t fit in their description of what’s right, you are _absolutely_ wrong.”

“Family dinners must be _peachy_ ,” joked Remus to lift his spirits, no one should live in a house like that. “Another?”

“Sure, why the hell not.”

Fifth one was down and now Sirius shined a bit too bright, but it was a wonderful sight to witness.

“Is it just me or is this place getting hotter by the minute?” he asked and put his hair in a bun in matter of seconds, exposing his cheekbones to stand out with all their magnificence. The way his face was built could be studied as art and no one would object it.

_Dear Black Family, I don’t like you but I like your genes. Thank you._

“So, what about _your_ love life Sirius?” asked Remus. 

_Vodka should be called liquid courage._

“I haven’t found anyone to get hang up on,” replied Sirius nonchalantly. “I mean, I have dated a few people the last year but none of them affected me the way I wanted them too and you can deal with casual sex for so long.”

Remus almost choked on his own spit, he tried to brush it off with a small cough but it wasn’t working.

“Oh, sorry. I’m a bit too comfortable with those subjects,” apologised Sirius as he laughed. 

“Are you one of those people who believe in soulmates?”

“No, not necessarily,” he said with a soft smile and spark to his eyes, he was kind of slurring his words but it was very lovely. “I just believe that someday someone will come into my life and it will be so easy and natural, that I won’t even notice.”

“That sounds--” began Remus but a small hiccup interrupted him. “That sounds _beautiful_.”

“The last shot?”

“Yes, please,” answered Remus and he raised his glass one more time. “Here’s to us finding what we are looking for in the New Year.”

“I’ll drink to that.”

“You know it’s so funny,” he began. “I never thought I would spend my Christmas with a total stranger let alone bring him home and then go to a bar and get drunk with him.”

“I told you before there was a reason we met,” said Sirius, now he was slurring his words for sure. “A reason with million possibilities.” 

Maybe they hadn’t drink too much but they had drunk too fast and somehow it felt right. The small head spin and the halo around Sirius was all worth spending a night with him, alone. The way he talked about love, like he was a hopeless romantic which he wasn’t, the way his eyes shined from the alcohol in his blood and the way he smiled at him right this second. Remus wished his dream was reality so much but that, _that_ was also a possibility that came with the reason.

“Yeah, _possibilities_ ,” said Remus absent-mindedly. “Should we ask for the check and walk home?”

Sirius nodded and Remus raised his hand to get the attention of the waitress. When the check came both of them reached for their wallets but Sirius was convinced he wasn’t going to let Remus pay.

“Stop it,” he half shouted as he stretched his hand to hold Remus’ from reaching into his pocket and Remus felt his skin burn, it was the best feeling ever, even better than being drunk. “You are letting me stay at your place at least let Uncle Alphard buy us our drinks.”

“I can’t believe you used dead relative card,” said Remus angrily, he didn’t like when people bought him things.

“Stop being a killjoy and say _thank you_ , I thought Hope raised you better.”

“Thank you,” snickered Remus, not being able to continue being angry. As they went into the winter air he felt happy that there was alcohol in his blood, because it wasn’t as cold as he thought it would be.

“Excuse me while I hold onto you like a lost puppy because I will most definitely fall on ice,” said Sirius just before he put his arm in Remus’.

“And you think drunk me is a good place to hold on?” he teased. “I’m very much suspicious of your decision making.”

“Shut up and walk,” ordered Sirius. Remus abruptly stopped and turned his gaze around to give him a look that probably was very effective that Sirius almost instantly shrunk in size. “ _Sorry,_ but you should do that look more often.”

“Why?”

“It’s hot as fuck. Excuse my language.”

_Did he just?_

“Are you serious?” asked Remus, just to be sure. Sirius raised his eyebrow as he does and smiled like a child and then it dawned on Remus.

“Why yes, I am Sirius.” he laughed.

“I just realised I won’t ever be able to use that word ever again.”

They walked silently as snow fell like cotton, it was peaceful and they were drunk. They entered the house as silently as they can and made their way to Remus’ room.

“Do you feel like sleeping at all?” demanded Sirius as he took his shirt off to reveal what dreams are made of.

_Not anymore._

“Dunno,” replied Remus, he had taken his sweater off, too, he couldn’t be bothered with being embarrassed at the moment and he turned around to face Sirius, he was looking at him like he just saw a ghost.

“What’s-- what’s that?”

Remus always forgot his scar, he had gotten so used to it that it didn’t even occur to him he would never want Sirius to see it.

“Oh, I had a massive heart surgery when I was younger,” he revealed as he stared at his own chest, Sirius had gotten closer to get a closer look. The more he got closer, the harder it was to breathe. Sirius raised his hand as if he wanted to touch it, Remus understood his curiosity since Sirius didn’t seem to have even a scratch on his skin.

“Can I?”

“Yeah sure, go ahead.”

Remus closed his eyes at the touch without intending to, his hands were cold but very careful as if he was afraid he would open the wound again. He didn’t know what made him trust Sirius enough to let his hands roam on his scar but it was a different feeling and he was praying that Sirius wasn’t feeling his heartbeats through his skin, each beat was another possibility.

“I’m glad you are alright now,” he whispered as he pulled his hand away. “We should probably sleep.”

“Yeah, we shouid,” repeated Remus as he went to turn the light off, it was going to take days for Remus to live that down.

“Night, Remus,” mumbled Sirius sleepily.

“Night, Sirius.”

As soon as Remus closed his eyes, all the possibilities flooded his mind like a tsunami and he just focused on one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellooo, just a small note for you guys. I won't be uploading for a few days because first of all New Year's eve and second of all I have a small thing to do.  
> I wish a Happy New Year to all of you and I genuinely hope you like this chapter because it was a challenge to write.  
> Thanks for reading <3


	6. texting I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Okay so I have written a few text messages between the characters because I felt like it. This is not an actual chapter, I just wanted to have some fun and this happened. This is just a test of sorts._

##  _DECEMBER 25TH_

_[Sirius & Regulus]_

S: Hey Reg, did they talk to you today?

R: no, I didn’t expect them to tbh

S: how’s Venice?

R: bloody brilliant. what are you doing today?

S: getting shitfaced??

R: sounds like a plan to me, I wish I came back though so you weren’t alone.

S: Don’t worry about me, Happy Christmas Reg.

R: Merry Christmas Siri.

* * *

_[Remus & Peter] _

P: Did you get a present for Jamie?

P: Oi Remus?

P: REEEMUUUUS

P: where are you, you fucker your phone is dead

P: If you don’t answer me in five minutes we are getting a divorce

R: no I didn’t and my phone died wtf did you expect me to do?

P: Send an owl?

R: Fuck off

P: can we buy something together for the Jamie and Lils? my feet hurt

R: just cook a bloody pie and shove Jamie’s head in it

P: …

R: Yeah sure, I will deal with it.

P: MY SAVIOUR

R: Shut it.

P: Gladly.

* * *

_[Sirius & Regulus]_

S: Apparently I’m not spending it alone, I’ll text you in the morning

R: wtf does that mean?

R: Siri?

R: I’m going to kill you

* * *

##  _DECEMBER 26TH_

_[Sirius & Regulus]_

S: I’m going at his place for the nye? where his parents live?

R: what if he’s a serial killer Siri

S: he’s too hot to be a serial killer

R: Serial killers are generally hot people?

S: okay smartass he’s too good to kill anything, I asked him if he wanted anything to drink last night and he said tea

R: oh okay point taken, be careful and have fun

S: don’t I always?

* * *

[ _Remus & Lily_]

R: I need you to contain James when he gets here

L: Why?

R: I met someone on Christmas night and I brought them home with me?

L: REMUS! WHO IS HE?! OR IS IT A SHE??

R: He is a he. Promise you’ll contain James

L: Okay okay. Promise. AAAA I’M SO EXCITED

* * *

##  _DECEMBER 27TH_

_[Peter & James]_

J: Remus brought someone home with him for nye

P: he did?

J: Yes and he told Lily to contain me I am offended

P: he has a point Jamie

J: WHAT

P: you tend to be hard on Remus’ dates

J: I have never

P: do you remember the girl from his uni classes and you did a bloody google search on the girl and asked her why she broke up with her ex?

J: I was trying to protect my friend

P: that’s hardcore stalking

J: I don’t stalk, I investigate. I’m a journalist after all.

P: Fuck off

J: Do you know his name?

P: no, drop it.

J: fuck no.

* * *

_[Peter & Lily]_

P: LILS

L: WHAT?

P: James is about to do some stupid shit about the lad Remus brought home

L: dear god. I’m going to kill him

P: don’t let learn his name.

L: yeah I won’t I still haven’t forgotten about that poor girl

P: he had a point but still

L: don’t encourage him

P: don’t worry I won’t good luck with the stubborn asshole

L: thanks Petey

* * *

 

##  _DECEMBER 28TH_

_[Remus & Lily]_

R: I’m drujnk and he’s too good tp be trUE

L: hahahah are you fucking serious?

R: I wsih I was

L: What?

* * *

_[Sirius & Regulus]_

S: Reggoeee

R: Are you drunk?

S: yes and he’s so cyte I want to rip him apart

R: people don’t rip apart things they like Siri

S: I MEANT HIS CLOSTHES

R: you are a bloody mess

S: he’s so hot I feel threatened

R: wow, did Sirius Black admit there’s someone better looking than him?

S: dotn tell anyone I said that

R: go to sleep Siri

S: you go to sleep


	7. secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _December 29th_

Remus opened his eyes slowly to the blinding light, it was like God forgot to turn down the brightness today, the winter sun was entering through the only window in his small room swallowing everything else. The headache was nothing like he had ever had to endure, it was like elephants were dancing in his brain and it hurt to even blink. He knew he didn’t drink as much as he normally could but he had gotten so caught up in the beauty that is Sirius Black, he had forgotten he wasn’t used to drinking this fast. Remus’ hand unintentionally went to where his scar was as his mind hanged on every small memory of the raven haired man and it all came back to him, Sirius had seen him without a shirt on and his flawless long fingers had roamed on Remus’ skin.  

Remus didn’t know how to feel. He remembered the relief and the euphoria he felt as Sirius touched the scar on his chest, how he expected his touch to burn but how it was like magic flowing through his fingertips to his skin. He was still sleeping his arm over his eyes as he shuffled ever so slightly in his sleep, the shuffling got a bit stronger with every second that passed and Sirius started pushing something Remus couldn’t see.

“No, please!” he begged, he was asleep but his words were clear. Why would a man like Sirius would have nightmares? Remus got out of his bed and went by him.

“Sirius?” he whispered, terrified of touching him he hovered over him.

“It wasn’t his fault, please,” he continued, his voice croaked and tearful.

“Sirius?” said Remus firmly, still not touching him, he hoped he would wake up.

“NO!” echoed his voice and Remus found himself slowly shaking Sirius.

“Sirius? _Come on_ , it’s a nightmare,” he pleaded, as pale grey eyes opened with so much fear in them Remus felt his heart break, he was like an abandoned puppy. His hands were on Remus’ arms holding onto him like he was on the edge of a cliff, his nails were softly digging into Remus’ slightly darker skin without intending to. “It’s just a nightmare, you are awake and no one can hurt you as long as you are here with me. Alright?” 

He was breathing so heavily, Remus feared he would go into a panic attack but as his breathing regulated, his fingers were no longer as strong as they were. Sirius let his head fall back to his pillow and sighed.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m 25 years old and I still have nightmares, what a joke right?”

“It happens,” assured Remus, his headache that he had forgotten in the heat of the moment came back full force. “Argh!”

“What’s wrong?”

“ _Vodka_. Vodka is wrong,” he winced and got up from Sirius’ bed to go downstairs. “It’s almost noon, we should eat something or just take five advils and sleep again.”

“Five advils sound extremely unhealthy,” smiled Sirius. “We should eat something and drink loads of water, we’ll be back to normal in no time.”

When Remus went downstairs he found a note on the refrigerator from his mother saying that they were out for groceries since Peter, James and Lily would be arriving tomorrow, she was starting to get prepared. It would have been better if they were here to ease the tensions of last night and this morning combined but apparently Remus had to face his fear and look at Sirius in the eyes longer than five seconds.

The breakfast was too quiet for both of them, Remus knew the nightmare was just a cherry on top and he needed to breathe a little. 

“I really should check my e-mails before my boss murders me,” said Sirius as he pulled a laptop from his duffel bag. “Just because I took some time of doesn’t mean she did.”

“Oh, yeah, sure go ahead let me give you the WiFi password,” Remus replied, relieved that he would have some time to go over his essays he had finished days ago just to have some distraction. Ever since the nightmare he hadn’t stopped thinking about what Sirius saw and what he was so scared of.

“Thanks,” muttered Sirius with a smile that would bring the spring to North Pole.

They were sitting together in the living room, Remus drowning in all the papers surrounding him, the only noise in the house was coming from Sirius’ keyboard. The thoughts were pushing him to talk to Sirius about the nightmare but that voice in the back was warning him not to. His logic said no but his heart said yes, because he never wanted to see that fear in Sirius’ eyes ever again.

“Can I ask you something?” he blurted, his logic defeated again. This didn’t happen before, not until he met Sirius Black.

“Mm-hm.”

“What was your nightmare about?”

“I’m afraid that is something I need to keep a secret for the time being Remus,” he replied without even lifting his head up. 

“If you say so,” he shot back as softly as he can but he was a little disappointed that he didn’t trust him enough to tell him what it was, he got back to reading his essays and he could feel Sirius’ gaze on himself burning through his skin but he kept his head down.

Why did he feel entitled to know maybe his deepest darkest secret when it hadn’t been a week since they had met? Why did he feel sad that Sirius didn’t trust him as much as he trusted him? Why did he trust Sirius? What was so special about him that all the walls Remus had built up all his life came down this easily?

When Hope and Lyall came back Remus threw himself in the kitchen a little too eagerly to help his parents. It wasn’t that he had a problem with Sirius but it seemed like Sirius had a problem with something Remus can’t put his finger on.

“So how was last night?” asked his mother eagerly. “Did you have fun?”

“It was alright, I guess,” he answered, his mind anywhere else but where it should be.

“Did something happen?”

“No, actually it didn’t,” said Remus. “I don’t know what’s going on either mum, I just roll with it.”

“He doesn’t look like his usual self,” whispered Hope. “It’s like his blood is drained.”

“He woke up with a nightmare this morning,” he explained in response.

“My poor child. That’s probably the reason,” she said worriedly. “Did you ask him what’s wrong?”

“I didn’t dare to be honest,” he replied as he stared at the beautiful man sitting on the couch his eyes fixed on the laptop screen, his hair messy and his head low.

It had been a weird day and Hope was aware as they didn’t talk through the dinner either. She had tried to get them talking but it was like Sirius pulled a veil around himself and was unreachable. How did so much had changed from last night to this morning and to this moment?

When they decided they should sleep, Remus decided he should probably start a conversation so that they would end the day on a high note.

“Umm, I should probably warn you about James,” he began as he watched Sirius change into his pyjamas. “He can be a bit intimidating and weird but he means well. You’ll get used to him after a few hours.”

Sirius just smiled as he pulled the blanket over his bed. 

“I’m sure we’ll get along just fine if he’s your best friend,” he said without the slightest change in his voice.

“Yeah, he tends to be a little too wary of people he just met,” continued Remus without taking his eyes off of him, begging for just a glance his way. “Have I done something wrong?”

_I really should start thinking before I speak._

“Why would you say that?” said Sirius sounding genuinely surprised. “Of course not, you didn’t.”

“You have been, uh, a little different all day.”

“It’s nothing, I was just consumed by all the work that piled up,” he lied, it was as apparent as the moon in the sky.

“Alright,” he replied and turned the light off. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Remus.”


	8. infamous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _December 30th_

It had been weeks since Remus had seen his old friends. When he got out of the bed it was around 7 am, James was known to be an early bird. He was one of those people who would go to the airport 4 hours early, just in case.  It was hard for all of them to get together and Remus always felt excited when it was the four of them because he was bound to his friends more than it was normal, and he knew that. However, even though he was excited he knew the reason he woke up this early wasn’t because he was going to see his best friends, it was because they were going to meet Sirius. He didn’t know why he felt on the edge as if he was introducing them to his future husband but he had this small voice in his head reminding him all the things that can go wrong.

Peter was always the silent one in their group of friends, or so it seemed. Remus sometimes wanted to put tape over Peter’s mouth to get him to shut up but as soon as someone new came along, he became the quietest person in the room. They had known each other since they were 10 years old and their parents were really close friends as well. He was slightly chubbier but it came with the job he had. He was a cook in a good restaurant in London, he was aiming higher but since he had just come back from France, he figured he could do with some experience in the kitchen before applying to prestigious restaurants. He generally had self confidence issues that James and Remus tried to destroy but Remus knew from himself that wasn’t an easy thing to do.

Remus met James when he was in high school, he was the rich popular kid of their school, all the girls blushed when he talked to them but he had been smitten by Lily Evans the moment he saw her. It took some good time to take James’ head out of his ass. He had good grades without studying one bit and he was the captain of their football team, which again was a subject he was pretty good at it, he wanted to pursue a career as a footballer but he gave up on that dream for a family life with Lily, so he became a sports journalist in a good newspaper, doing something he loved and enjoying it. James always had been the best at what he did and he knew it, until he met Lily.

Lily Evans was Remus’ study partner back then and now a teacher in a primary school. She was a bright and popular student like James who got stuck in the middle of a high school drama up until junior year, then she rightfully decided that she didn’t have to put up with people who talked behind her back every chance they got. Lily hold James back from doing all the stupid things he would have done. She hated James until their final year with all of her being for being the biggest prat she had ever seen. She had once called James _an arrogant bullying toe rag and_ Remus still hadn’t let that go, she was always creative with her insults and also she had a point, James was always a bit too harsh to people he didn’t know or trust.

That was one of the main reasons Remus was so worried about them meeting because James didn’t have a filter when it came to protecting his friends. He always felt like he needed to protect his friends even though they were all adults now.

It was around 10 am when James, Lily and Peter showed up at the front lawn of the Lupins.

“MOOONYYYYYYY”

“Dear God, aren’t we over that bloody nickname?” said Remus as he wrapped his arms around James, they were around the same height and Remus was always a big fan of his hugs.

“Hey there mate,” said Peter, his arms filled with ridiculous amounts of pies and a huge grin on his face. “I’m gonna hug the living shit out of you when I put these down.”

“Peter, language,” interrupted Hope as she smiled at the shorter boy. “I told you not to make pies, you always over work yourself.”

_Pies? Pies! James and Lily’s gift. Peter’s going to kill me._

“It’s the least I can do,” he replied as he made his way in.

Lily was staring at Remus with a spark in her eyes, probably because she was excited to meet Sirius.

“Where is he?”

“I missed you too, Lils,” teased Remus as he took some of the bags from her. “He’s probably just waking up from the noise James is making in the house.”

Remus was right, when all of them where inside trying to carry bags and put pies in the refrigerator, Sirius climbed down the stairs with all his glory. He was a little taken aback at first but then he got his senses back and smiled at all the faces staring at him. Lily was drooling a little, James was offended and Peter almost dropped the rhubarb pie he was holding.

“Hello, I’m Lily.”

She was the first one to get out of the spell Sirius tend to put on people and she extended a hand for Sirius to shake.

“Hello, Lily. Nice to meet you finally. I’m Sirius,” he said as he shook her hand. “You must be James.”

Sirius extended a hand to the taller boy who hesitantly shook it.

“And those pies must be your creation Peter,” he continued with a smile on his face and Peter couldn’t decide where to put the pie so he extended the pie instead of his hand.

“Uh, sorry, nice to meet you Sirius.”

“No worries,” said Sirius and smiled at Remus. He was back to normal but Remus didn’t like the way James looked at Sirius as if he knew something the others didn’t.

“I’m sorry what did you say your last name was?” asked James and received a good nudge from Lily to his ribs.

“Sorry, my bad,” apologised Sirius. “It’s Black.”

“That’s where I know you name from, the heir to the _infamous_ Black family.” 

“JAMES!” yelled Remus, Lily and Peter together.

“Your family helped that dude who ripped poor people off get away with what he did,” accused James without even listening to the others. “Whatshisface, Tom Ri-”

“James _enough_!” interrupted Lily but he didn’t look like he was going to stop at all.

“Riddle,” completed Sirius, his eyes as cold as ice and hatred so visible in his face, Remus took an involuntary step back. “Do you always accuse people of something they haven’t done when you meet them James?”

“I know it was the Blacks. _Your_ family helped him get-”

“I am _disowned_ ,” he shot back. “If you had read those _news_ properly you would have known the Blacks no longer have an heir.”

With that Sirius turned away and walked out of the house taking his coat from the rack and slammed the door as he left.

“I swear to God James, you are insufferable sometimes,” said Peter as he rubbed his forehead. “You can’t tell whatever the fuck is on your mind whenever you feel like it.”

“Peter!”

“Sorry Mrs. Lupin, he went too far,” he conceded. James was looking like a deer in headlights. Remus wanted to yell and shout at James but he just couldn’t find the right words.

“I’m going go after him,” he mumbled as he wore his shoes. “And you will apologise to him or so help me God, I will make you _pay_ James.”

As soon as Remus pulled the door, he heard Lily going off, she always held her fury in hopes of not aggravating the situation but Remus knew her green eyes were making James feel like he is 3 feet tall at the moment.

Sirius was walking in the snow in the front lawn, a cigarette between his thing fingers looking down at his feet as he took a long drag and inhaled the grey smoke.

“I was going so good, you know,” said Sirius suddenly. “I hadn’t smoked since I met you, that’s a personal record.”

“I’m sorry about James,” began Remus but the raven haired man raised his hand as to stop him talking.

“Don’t worry about it,” he objected. “I don’t blame him.”

“I do,” snapped Remus. “He always meddles with things he shouldn’t and talks without thinking.”

“He wants to protect you,” countered Sirius with a weak smile on his face. “My family are dangerous people after all.”

“I am 25 years old, I can make decisions for myself, thanks.”

“I never had a friend like James, who would go this far to protect me,” confessed Sirius as he threw the finished cigarette away, even the way he puffed the smoke out was so brilliant Remus wanted to smack James on the head for making an angel sad. “I over-reacted, s–”

“No, he deserves all the yelling he is getting from Lily,” he interrupted. “It’s not his place to talk to you about your family right after meeting you, he doesn’t even _know_ you.”

“And you do?”

“I like to think so,” babbled Remus. “Let’s go inside, you will freeze with that t-shirt.”

“I think James started the World War 3,” teased Sirius with a smile that reached his eyes. 

“He had it coming,” replied Remus as he opened the front door. The room was silent and Hope and Lyall had left. Lily, Peter and James were staring at them with wondering eyes.

“I am sorry for making assumptions about you without getting to know you first. I shouldn’t have said anything and waited until we talked a bit more. I tend to get stupid when it comes to my friends. I apologise and hope you don’t hate my guts or want to punch me. But if you do please _not the face._ ”

Sirius grinned at the last part of James’ apology and shook his head.

“Apology accepted and now if you let me, I would like you to know the real story,” began Sirius and he moved to the living room to sit down. “Because I know loads of people hate me, since they hate my family, at least their law firm.”

“My parents have a law firm with two other families, all the children from these families generally go to the best law schools in the country and they are raised to be cut throat lawyers. That firm is called _Lestrange, Malfoy & Black_. I don’t know who the new heir is but it’s probably my not-so-lovely cousin Bella.”

He took a deep breath as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“I already had enough of the shit they did until last Christmas but after the incident I left our family business and started working for their rivals,” smiled Sirius, he looked proud of the choice he made. “I knew Kingsley from the law school, he was older than me and I asked if I could start working where he was working, he pulled a few strings and got me into _Weasley & Prewett_.”

“I- I didn’t-”

“Don’t fret about it James,” said Sirius with a smile. “Happens to the best of us.”

“Now I have a better job, I work with better people and I like what I do for a change,” he concluded and he laid back looking around the faces in the room, lingering on Remus a bit longer. “And I am no longer around my poisonous family.”

“Well you sound like you will fit right in with us,” said Lily as she got up. “We really should put our things in our rooms.”

“I think we are going to go take a walk with Sirius,” announced Remus.

“We are?”

“Yes, now come on, get dressed,” he urged Sirius and when Lily and James were out of earshot he explained the situation. “I forgot to buy them a gift.”

“Now, now Remus, what kind of a friend are you?” he laughed in return. “Let’s go and maybe I will let you benefit from my incredible ability to choose gifts.”

“Please do because I’m a disaster when it comes to choosing gifts,” pleaded Remus with a frown on his face.

“You’ll have to take me with you anytime you go for gift shopping then?”

“I guess I’ll have to.”


	9. revenge

“I have an idea about the gift but I don’t know if you would approve,” said Sirius with a wicked smile on his face.

“What do you got in mind?”

“A small _revenge_ ,” he grinned. “One I think all of us would approve, even Lily.”

“Humour me,” replied Remus, already liking where this was going. “It’s been a long time since I have pulled a proper prank on Jamie. We were an abomination in high school.”

“I won’t believe that Remus Lupin was a menace at school,” laughed Sirius in reply. “You look too innocent to pull pranks on people.”

“Lucky for me, that’s what the teachers thought, too,” he bragged. “I mostly got out of detention when James and Peter stayed after school.”

“And he’s _sneaky_ ,” teased Sirius as he nudged Remus on his arm. “It’s always the least suspected one I guess.”

“You said James was taking his time proposing to Lily, yeah?”

“Yes but wouldn’t that be too m–”

“I’m not going to buy them wedding rings Remus,” interrupted Sirius as he shook his head. “Do I look _that_ cruel?”

_No, you look like an angel._

“That’s not what I meant,” apologised Remus quickly, his eyes fixed on a snowflake on Sirius’ hair.

“ _Stop apologising_ ,” he scolded. “I’m just kidding. Now, let’s get to work.”

They walked around a little bit, entering the shops who would close soon enough, trying to find something that would mortify James and make the others laugh. They were in a toys shop when Remus heard Sirius’ victorious laughter. He was holding a huge box that had a picture of a small kid making pottery on it.

“I mean,” he began, grinning. “If he makes assumptions about my last name, I can make assumptions about his, too.”

“Right you are,” replied Remus as he stared at the glow Sirius had, he was genuinely happy. “Now let’s go get them a _proper_ gift.”

They went in and out of a few more shops and found beautiful wooden figures of a stag and a doe, Lily had always loved deer for some reason and Remus was sure she would enjoy it very much. 

“We must get back before they are weirded out,” warned Remus as he took the gift from the counter and made his way out of the cute little shop.

“I can’t wait to see the look on James’ face when he opens this.”

“He would have punched you if you were someone else,” he joked. “But now, he has to behave and I want to see how _that_ goes.”

“Do you think they liked me? I mean your friends?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Just checking, you know, I don’t want anyone to get in between me and all the possibilities in front of me,” said Sirius as he stared into Remus’ eyes briefly before turning his gaze forward.

“I, _uh_ , I’m sure they liked you,” he stammered, trying to keep his composure. 

_Please, tell me more about the possibilities._

“It would take days to go over all of them,” replied Sirius, a little taken aback but content about what he had just heard.

“Did I say that out loud?” whispered Remus to himself, staring straight ahead hoping Sirius wouldn’t realised he just completely ignored him. It had been a long time since he was this embarrassed.

“Yes,” he said, Remus couldn’t see but hear his grin. “You did.”

“Excuse me while I go bury my head in the snow ostrich style.”

“No need to be embarrassed about the possibilities,” said Sirius his pale grey eyes somehow warmer than they had ever been. “They are _just_ possibilities after all.”

Just when Remus thought it was too hot even though it was snowing, they reached the house and entered to a chaos in the kitchen. Hope and Peter had started preparations and James was trying to smuggle food as he always did. 

“Where were you two?” asked Lily as she pulled James from the collar of his shirt. 

“We had a few errands to run,” replied Remus nonchalantly and put the gifts under the Christmas tree in the living room. “What have you been up to?”

“Oh the regular,” Peter chimed in. “James is being insufferable, Lily is trying to set me up with Mary and she’s talking about–”

Hope softly smacked Peter on the head before he could finish his sentence which made Remus think whatever he was going to say was about Sirius. 

“I’m going upstairs to take a shower if that’s alright?” mentioned Sirius as he made his way to the staircase and all of them said “yeah, sure” in unison.

As soon as Sirius was out of sight, Lily started pestering him with questions. Remus knew this was inevitable but he hoped, she would have waited until the holidays were over. 

“When you said you brought someone home, I didn’t expect a Greek God Remus,” grunted Lily. “He is drop dead gorgeous.”

“I almost did drop dead when I first saw him,” teased Remus but it was half true, he had lost his balance when Sirius opened the door.

“I feel threatened,” said James. “Why do I feel threatened?”

“Because for once there’s someone better looking than you in this house?” suggested Peter. “No offence Remus, but you know him.”

“Non taken,” he smiled. “I know _exactly_ what you mean.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” shouted James.

“Nothing,” replied Remus and Peter at the same them, trying to stifle their laughters.

“Anyways,” began James as he ruffled his already mess of a hair. “What’s the deal with you two? Are you dating? Are you flirting?”

“We are just friends.”

“Yeah sure,” said Lily sarcastically. “I may be oblivious but even I can tell whatever this is, it is not simple friendship.”

“I told you,” giggled Hope as she washed something in the sink. “It seems _you_ are the oblivious one here cariad.”

“Ugh,” sighed Remus. “Stop it all of you. You are giving me ideas that are impossible to be real.”

“We’ll see about that,” stated Peter and he returned to what he was doing.

Remus left the kitchen and went out to the back lawn to get some fresh air. How did they even think something could happen between him and Sirius? Why did they insist on feeding him false hopes? Remus never had been a hopeless romantic before, he never went for someone he was sure was out of his league and there he was daydreaming about the celestial being that is Sirius Black.

New Year meant better things, that’s what everyone said and Remus found himself believing in that saying for the first time because he needed it. He needed to believe that New Year would bring him Sirius and make his life better than it had ever been.

_We’ll see._


	10. threshold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _New Year’s Eve, morning_

“James,” whispered someone urgently. “Come here and just help me hang this.”

“Remus is going to kill you,” warned James also whispering.

“I’ll just blame it on you,” replied Lily. “Just hang it up _please_.”

“He is still angry with me, blame it on Petey.”

“Oh for goodness’ sake,” she scolded with a manner that was so Lily, Remus smiled sleepily. “ _Hurry!_ ”

“ _Alright_ , alright. It’s done.”

Remus rubbed his eyes slowly and opened them to the light filling his room. His eyes lingered on Sirius sleeping in his bed with a calm look on his face and his hair in a bun. There was this one stubborn lock that wouldn’t stay put and was stuck on his long eyelashes. That was Sirius after all, looking put together but being free as can be. 

He slowly pushed the blanket off of him and felt the chill of the morning air on his skin as he carefully lifted himself from his bed, making sure he doesn’t wake up Sirius. Lily, James and Peter’s parents would be arriving anytime now, Remus knew he had to wear good clothes or Hope would make him suffer for it, so he took out a flannel out of his bag and put it on with some proper looking jeans.

Sirius shuffled it his bed just when Remus was trying to make his hair look presentable.

“Morning,” he mumbled sleepily and he yawned with both his hands stretched out and Remus caught himself checking his biceps from the mirror but he quickly got a hold of himself.

“Good morning,” he said and turned around. “Do I look somewhat presentable?”

“You look wonderful,” replied Sirius without a moment of hesitation. “Now wait for so I don’t do the weird entrance again.”

Sirius pulled on some tight black pants and a shirt on and it was like he woke up to be flawless.

“Let’s go.”

As they were walking out of the door, Remus felt something brush against his hair, when he lifted his gaze up he saw what it was that Lily hang up before he woke up.

“Lily Evans, I’m going to murder you,” he murmured.

“I thought mistletoes were a Christmas tradition,” said Sirius with a smirk on his face.

“They are,” said Remus in response with a small smile on his face. “Lily is just, a bit _nosy_ sometimes.”

 “If she wanted for us to kiss so much,” he began. “She should have just asked.”

Remus didn’t understand what happened next for a good five minutes. It started and ended at the same second, it was like lightning, there but gone the next time you look. It was the softest thing but it was something, he probably had to do it on his tiptoes. It was a game to his as it was a game to Lily but it had happened, the kiss itself was short lived but Remus felt it’s effect all around his body, on every inch of his skin like someone just gave him another chance at a better life. Remus had kissed before, and not just a peck, he had kissed _hard_ but none of them felt like this.

* * *

 

_Remus is up, up you get off your arse Black._

“Morning,” he said without opening his eyes, he could feel that one lock over his eyes, pretending like he wasn’t ever in the bun last night when Sirius went to bed. Sirius yawned and stretched his body to be able to walk when he got up the bed, he could see Remus checking his arms out and his stomach did an upside down flip.

“Good morning,” replied Remus, he was trying to fix his hair in the mirror in front and looking at his flannel from different sides. “Do I look somewhat presentable?”

He did, he looked more than enough actually but the wooziness of his slumber kept Sirius from saying eloquent words, he tried come up with something clever to say that would sweep Remus off of his feet.

“You look _wonderful_.”

_Yes, very clever Sirius, glad you thought of that._

But he did, he did look wonderful, a slight blush to his cheeks, he hair still messy but decent in it’s own perfect way and warm eyes that smiled at him. He was more than wonderful.

“Now wait for so I don’t do the weird entrance again.”

Sirius pulled out his favourite black jeans, a little bit tighter than normal but his butt looked marvellous in it and he thought Remus would appreciate the thought. He made his hair into a messy bun that looked somewhat put together and turned to face Remus.

“Let’s go.”

When they were walking out of the room, Remus stopped abruptly, Sirius just assumed he had forgotten something.

“Lily Evans, I’m going to murder you,” he heard Remus whisper to himself. When he turned around to see what was wrong, he saw that a mistletoes was hanging from the top of Remus’ door sill.

_Lily Evans, I love you._

“I thought mistletoes were a Christmas tradition,” he pointed out sarcastically. Remus wrinkled nose as he thought of an answer, he looked like a small child trying to find an excuse as to why he was playing football inside.

“They are,” he smiled weakly. “Lily is just, a bit _nosy_ sometimes.”

Sirius had many chances to do something like this but this, this was a proper sign screaming for him to kiss him. Not like full on, smashing around the walls kind of kissing of course but just a small taste for what’s to come. Now only if he could stop the goddamn butterflies wreaking havoc in his stomach...

“If she wanted for us to kiss so much,” he took a deep breath. “She should have just asked.”

Sirius rose to his tiptoes, because Remus was considerably taller than him and for once he enjoyed being the shorter one. His lips touched Remus’ softly, not more than a second but Sirius felt like he poked the plug with a fork. A kiss wasn’t supposed to feel like this? Had he been doing it wrong all his life? If this was what it felt like in a second, Sirius couldn’t help himself from thinking how it would feel like if he had it his way, kissing the taller man until there was no air left in his lungs and Remus was all he could feel.

Nevertheless he tried to keep his cool as he slowly made his way down the stairs. This was going to be one hell of a beginning to a new year.


	11. on time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _December 31st, afternoon_

Remus had been burning to get Lily alone ever since the kiss or whatever it was. He needed to talk about the kiss from the angel to someone, anyone to understand what was wrong with him. He didn’t feel the earth beneath his feet, nothing felt real. Was this what pure bliss felt like? 

When Evans, Potter and the Pettigrews arrived, it had been almost impossible to get anyone alone, because the place was so crowded, it was hard to move without bumping into someone and Remus always ran into Sirius and mumbled a shy “sorry” and literally ran away right afterwards. He didn’t know why he was acting like a kid in love but he had to talk to Lily to at least get the anger off of his chest. Was he really angry though, if she hadn’t put that mistletoe there, this morning wouldn’t have happened.

When Remus saw Lily walking towards their room, he darted off of the couch he was sitting in. He entered the room and closed the door after himself.

“It was James.”

“I heard you,” said Remus angrily. “I know it was you.”

“I thought-”

“You shouldn’t have,” he scolded as he looked straight into Lily’s green eyes. “You shouldn’t have forced him to kiss me.” 

“It’s not like it’s _magical_ ,” she mocked as she rolled her eyes. “I thought it would be a reminder, not a compeller.”

“Well it was--”

“What was it?”

“He _kissed_ me,” whispered Remus carefully.

“HE--” she started yelling but Remus covered her mouth just in time. “He _what_?”

“A small kiss, to fulfil the purpose of the mistletoe,” he explained. He tried to look angry with her but couldn’t help the smile spreading on his face. 

“You look like a kid in love.”

“I _am_ a kid in love,” confessed Remus. “I guess or maybe I am just infatuated because I mean look at him.”

“People fall in love in mysterious ways, Remus,” she smiled. There was something about Lily Evans that always seemed to calm him down. “Would you have ever imagined me and Potter together?”

“You kind of have a point,” he sighed. “But don’t you think it was too fast? Don’t you think I am jumping to conclusions?

“Love doesn’t exactly _warn_ before it comes,” she replied calmly. “It just does and you know when it does.”

Remus didn’t have an answer for that because he didn’t know if he was ready to face whatever his heart was feeling about the disowned heir of the Blacks at this moment in time.

“Let’s go back before James kills me,” urged Remus as he opened the door with loads of new thoughts in his mind.

Sirius had said it himself that night they got drunk together, _someday someone will come into my life and it will be so easy and natural, that I won’t even notice._ Remus had definitely noticed Sirius Black’s entrance into his mundane life but what he failed to notice was how he had acted around the shorter man, it was like he was someone he always wanted to be but never was. He had always dreamed of being more confident in his own skin and assertive but he had never been until he met Sirius Black. It wasn’t forced, it almost came _natural_ to him, confidence never came naturally to Remus, he most definitely had to fake it if ever he needed it.

Sirius was everything anyone could ask for on the outside, he was someone you would be proud to show off because he was like a masterpiece, something so valuable it deserved a good place in Louvre. However, Remus had gotten over the ethereal part of Sirius on the outside because a treasure was neatly hidden on the inside. His soft but battered skin carried so many memories that made him who he is today and Remus just wanted to study each an every memory and protect him from the ones that gave him nightmares. He wanted to be there for him when he woke up breathless in the middle of the night, fear in his pale eyes rather than walking around in the sunlight with his smile reaching his eyes. He wanted much more than just a small peck on his lips, he wanted his skin on his and his long fingers tangled in his sandy mess of a hair. He wanted him to cook breakfast for him everyday if that was what made him happy, he wanted him around for every holiday because out of all people, he didn’t deserve to be alone. Remus wanted to make sure Sirius was happy and he was the source of his happiness, as Sirius was his.

The halo around his beautiful face felt like an illusion to Remus but maybe that was just it, only Remus could see that halo because that halo was meant for him. Being around Sirius was the easiest thing Remus had done, yes he was a little intimidating because he looked celestial but Remus never felt the need to make himself look like something he wasn’t around him. Out of all people, he would have thought he would have needed to change around Sirius because he wanted to impress him so desperately but _no_. 

Remus had walked outside of the house absentmindedly as he drowned in his thoughts and he lifted his gaze and saw smoke twirling in the fresh air.

“Apparently I lack self-control.”

“Well, you got yourself a good new year’s resolution at least,” teased Remus as he watched the details of Sirius’ hands as he held the cigarette so elegantly.

“I told you,” he smiled. “I hadn’t smoked since I met you.”

“Bloody hell,” smirked Remus in response. “You’ll have to hang with me all the time then.”

“Ugh,” he whispered with disgust on his face but he couldn’t keep the grin off of his face either. “Just when I was trying to get rid of you.”

“I told you I was going to force my friendship on you Sirius.”

“I know,” he said and threw the finished cigarette far away. “You came into my life just on time. Now let’s go inside before Hope decides to serve _us_ for dinner.”

Out of all the days there could have been a snow storm it had been on Christmas. Out of all the houses, eight to be precise, Remus could have gone in, he had had chosen Sirius’ house and he had been just on time. What were the chances of this working out the way it did? Just one choice Remus made, he had opened the door to a billion possibilities and they had lead him to Sirius Black. Sirius was right, there ought to be a reason they had met and now, Remus was determined to find that reason and save Sirius from himself.


	12. wishful thinking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _December 31st, midnight_

_**ten** _

Sirius looked around at the smiling faces of the family he was the guest of. Everyone had a champagne glass in their hands, James’ arm around Lily’s waist, Hope and Lyall holding each other’s hand and him standing right beside Remus afraid to even breath. He still had the afterglow of the small kiss they had shared and was terrified out of his mind of saying or doing something wrong ruining everything that had happened during the past few days. Sirius had told Remus several times that they had met for a _reason_ and Sirius slowly started understanding what that could be, because he genuinely believed this wasn’t a coincidence.

_**Nine** _

How could something be so close but so far away at the same time? Wanting to touch, the _simplest_ thing, wanting contact but staying away nevertheless. Remus had always been good at controlling whatever he felt, if he was feeling angry he would make sure he controlled his temper, if he was sad he made sure no one saw it, it was how he got used to living. But ever since Sirius Black opened that door, Remus found it harder and harder to control his instincts around him. As everyone counted backwards from ten welcoming a new year, all Remus wanted to do was take Sirius far away from where they were, somewhere quieter, somewhere they can be _alone_.

_**Eight** _

Sirius hadn’t had the most beautiful life until last Christmas, from the outside his family looked the picture perfect, a rich family where there was respect and love which was the biggest lie Sirius could think of. However standing here with the Lupins and all these people that came, Sirius felt warmer inside and his hand inches away from the taller man he had met few days ago, he was convinced he had never felt anything like this before. He was burning inside just because he couldn’t touch him or kiss him or do anything else for that matter without worrying about losing him. But new year meant new hopes and new dreams, Sirius just wanted to move closer to his dream which was a tall man with sandy locks and the most beautiful heart he ever had the _happy misfortune_ to meet, it was a misfortune because Sirius was too broken to make anyone else happy but it had happened and it kept happening as his heart climbed to his throat when Remus moved a little closer.

_**Seven** _

Remus always had very strong views about love, he thought everyone mistook infatuation for love which was the case for many people. It was impossible, in his mind, for someone to fall magically in love with someone they had just met, those things only happened in movies and books. Real life was much more difficult and painful than some girl running into a boy with books in her hand and a few looks shared between them. Life didn’t have a script and you had to adapt or you failed to keep up. He glanced at his right and saw Sirius looking into the night sky intently, moonlight reflecting from his _dreamy_ eyes as any sort of light did and Remus felt his heart clench because he was ethereal and he had kissed him maybe 12 hours ago and all Remus could think about as he listened to everyone count back was when he would feel Sirius’ lips on his again.

_**Six** _

Sirius weighed the _possibilities_ that could go down if he were to press his lips on Remus’ again as the clock struck twelve, he had kissed him about 12 hours ago what was so wrong about wanting to do it again? Sirius had kissed many people and felt many skins on his as he struggled with everything going on in his life. Alcohol had been a good friend to him but his brain hadn’t, he had shared so much with so many unnecessary people. He regretted those 4 months intently and now he wished he could take them all back for Remus’ skin to be the only one that roamed on his, for him to erase all the mistakes Sirius had done at one point in his life. However he also wanted to run away because he wasn’t the person to make Remus Lupin happy, he deserved much more than a disowned dishonour to his family, he deserved someone who was whole and good for him. New year meant new hopes but Sirius felt more hopeless the more he thought about it.

_**Five** _

Remus had moved in closer with the hopes that maybe their hands would brush, he was 25 years old but felt like a small kid when it came to Sirius. If their hands had brushed maybe Remus would find the courage to kiss him in about five seconds. He could feel everyone checking how they are doing every now and then, Lily smiling to Remus encouragingly but just making him more anxious then he already is. It was no _secret_ amongst Lily, James, Peter and him that it was what Remus wanted, he had spent talking him into believing that Sirius actually liked him but he found that hard to believe. 

_**Four** _

_Maybe next time,_ thought Sirius. He wanted it so much that he was afraid of everything that could go wrong. The _infamous_ flirt Sirius Black was for once afraid of what the other person might feel like if he made a move. Normally, Siirus would meet someone and saw it in their eyes that they wanted him so it wouldn’t be much of a problem for him to do whatever he wanted to but with Remus, he couldn’t read his honey coloured eyes. He had heard him talk to Hope about how much he found him attractive but what Sirius wanted for once was to be wanted for what’s on the inside, it was such a different phenomenon that he couldn’t decide what to do with it.

_**Three** _

This is definitely karma, thought Remus. This was karma getting it’s _revenge_ for all the people he had turned down the past eight years, this wass for all the times he had long discussions with people who claimed they fell in love at first sight because as the seconds ran out Remus got more and more frustrated because he wasn’t going to be kissing Sirius the way Lily would be kissing James and he wanted that more than anything. He was angry that he had began to fall for a stranger he had met six days ago. He knew revenge normally hurt but he was glad karma was shutting him up in the best way possible, there was no need to rush things.

_**Two** _

Sirius moved a little closer to Remus, there was no escaping contact now but he had given up his dreams about kissing him, why rush things when you can take it nice and slow? Sirius’ relationships had always failed because he was always in such a haste about things and he wasn’t going to make the same mistake with Remus because this time he wanted this one to stay and be his. They had passed the scary _threshold_ of skin contact a several times and that was enough and beautiful, sometimes the best way was the gentlest one. Sirius made sure his hand strayed away from his sides a little before turning his gaze to Remus.

_**One** _

Remus felt the cold skin of Sirius on his hand just _on time_. 

“Happy new year Remus”

“Happy new year Sirius”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have tried doing something with the chapter names up until now, to have a different style of chapter just for this one and I hope you like it.   
> After this I will be delving a bit into Sirius' life and I'm afraid there will be a little bit of abuse mention for his life before he left the Black house, for both him and Regulus. I will write a note for every chapter that requires a warning but I just wanted to still write about it here and maybe not talk about it as much if it would make anyone uncomfortable.  
> I hope you guys liked this chapter, from now on _miracle_ is no longer _only_ a Christmas fic and I guess I have you all to thank for.


	13. brave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whole lotta alcohol mention

Sirius Black woke up to sun in his eyes. Ever since that bloody neighbour of his cut off that big tree he had stopped sleeping on this side of the bed because the sun was unbearable. So why was he even sleeping on one side when he had all of the bed to himself? Just as he was trying to figure out what was going on, he felt shuffling next to him.

_No._

Sirius didn’t dare turn around, he knew what he had done. Defence mechanism of his body was getting stupid when he started feeling things. Remus was too perfect and Sirius was not. Remus deserved better and Sirius didn’t, so Sirius drank his sorrows away and went home with someone random. What was his problem? Good things happened to bad people, why couldn’t he just accept that maybe this one time fate favoured him?

After New Years’ Eve, Sirius had distanced himself from Remus, it was too good to be true. One thing Sirius knew was if something was flawless, there was most definitely something wrong with it. When he was a child, if his mother was too nice to him Sirius knew something bad was coming, that was just how it is. 

Also, he liked screwing things up. He broke everything he touched, as his mother so eloquently put into words. So why break the tradition? He would break Remus, too. A few unanswered messages and a few broken promises and he stopped caring almost instantly. It had been four months since he last saw Remus and not one day had gone by Sirius hadn’t thought about Remus, his face, his voice, his smile. 

You might wonder, why would someone torture themselves knowing they love someone? Why wouldn’t they accept even thought the chance that it might work out is higher than the worse option? Why would they distance themselves even though the other person tried reaching out? Why?

 _Fear._ Fear makes you do stupid things and fortune always favours the brave. 

Sirius pushed the thin blanket away and got up to take a shower without even glancing to the girl with blonde hair laying next to him. She was without a doubt gorgeous and she was his denial. 

“You can’t run away from your own home, you know?” she murmured as Sirius was tiptoeing away. Sirius could hear her smile.

“I was just trying to have a shower, actually.”

“Ah, okay,” she said. “It was nice talking to you last night.”

“Come again?”

“I said, it was nice _talking_ to you.” 

“We, uh, talked? Just talked?” asked Sirius again, just to make sure.

“You almost cried, does that count?” said the pretty girl with a smirk. “Almost made me cry, too, and I’m not known to have many emotions.”

“I-- _what?_ ”

“You are in love mate, as I am,” she laughed. “What was his name, umm, Ra-- no, Re--”

“ _Remus._ ” 

“Ah, yes him,” she smiled as she raised her eyebrows up. “Also you promised me you would text him today, so keep your bloody promise please.”

“Yeah.. not happening,” shot back Sirius almost instantly. “I’m pretty sure he hates me.”

“I’m pretty sure he doesn’t,” she objected. “Who picks up the phone at 3 am if they hate the person calling?”

“I CALLED HIM?” yelled Sirius in shock. This wasn’t happening. Sirius Black was not drunk dialling people. “Why didn’t you stop me .... What was your name again?”

“Marlene.”

“Yes, why didn’t you stop me Marlene?!” 

“I am sorry, I’m not _your mum_ Black,” she snapped. “You are a grown-ass man who is in love, own up to your shit.”

“You are insulting me but I like it,” teased Sirius. “I think I’m going to keep you.”

“Oh, thank you sire,” she said sarcastically as she made a bowing gesture. “No but seriously you can drink, I think _I’m_ going to keep you.”

“So how did you end up in my bed?”

“Yeah, funny story,” she began. “You were like ‘I can’t sleep alone tonight’ so I just stayed with you, your hair is frighteningly beautiful, do tell what you use.”

“Thank you Marlene,” he replied with as much gratitude as he can muster. “For taking care of me, you didn’t have to.”

“You were like a lost puppy,” she shrugged. “Any decent person would have helped but now you have to listen to me and my problems tonight.” 

“I genuinely have nothing better to do on a Saturday night,” Sirius laughed. “Can we drink coffee?”

“No, you promised me whisky.”

“I feel like you’re making it up because I don’t remember.”

“I would _never_..”

“Do you remember what I said to Remus when we were talking?” asked Sirius, his heart in his mouth.

“Not much, you mostly just apologised,” answered Marlene, looking guiltily. “Several times, like non-stop.”

“Lovely,” grunted Sirius. “I need to apologise at least, right?”

“If you love him, and you do, do more than apologising,” suggested Marlene. “You deserve more Sirius even though you don’t think you do. All you need is a little self love and I know it’s hard but Remus was good for you and you were good for him.”

Sirius looked puzzled, apparently he did all the talking last night.

“You told me every little detail of your relationship,” smiled Marlene as a reply to Sirius’ face. “I know you have no reason to trust me but I did take care of you, so give it a chance because you have nothing to lose but so much to gain.”

“How the bloody hell did I meet you in that god forsaken bar?”

“We all have sorrows.”

“That we do.”


	14. 37 seconds

“He drunk dialled me.”

“Who?”

“Sirius?”

“I’m not serious.”

“No, Lily,” said Remus as he took a deep breath. “ _Sirius Black_ drunk dialled me.”

“WHAT!?”

“He apologised for 37 seconds straight,” explained Remus trying to sound as calm as possible. “He was slurring his words and--”

“It’s been _four months_ Remus,” cut off Lily. 

“Four fucking months!” yelled James from the back, he sounded angry. “The nerve that guy has, I knew we shouldn’t have trusted him with our Remus, I just kn--”

“Shut it Potter,” ordered Lily. “You guys were planning your next meeting when he was leaving.”

Remus laughed bitterly. One moment Sirius was planning grabbing lunch with James on their lunch break and two days later he wasn’t replying Remus’ texts. New Years Eve was four months ago and this was the first time he had heard from Sirius, it was as if that one week had never happened, as if Remus never knocked on his door on Christmas.

However, Remus knew it was too good to be true. He knew his mum and friends were overrating and over analysing what Sirius and Remus had or in the light of recent events, didn’t have. 

When he thought about last night, Remus had doubts again. That bloody arse. Remus was completely over him, it took him a few weeks to get over how angry and disappointed he was but he was done with him and he had the nerve to call him when he was drunk off his face and give Remus hope.

“Remus?”

“Mm?”

“Don’t trust him,” warned Lily softly. “I know you want to believe but I just feel like he is one of those people who drunk dial people because they are alone.”

“You don’t know him like th--”

“I know he left my best friend after giving him hope,” she snapped. “I know if he had cared about you, he wouldn’t have done what he did.”

Remus let the words sink in. She was right in her way but Remus was right in his. Sirius wasn’t like any other person you would run into on the street. He was different, he had a different past and Remus wanted to listen to Lily but he wasn’t going to. He had spent his Saturday staring at the phone for hours on end before.

“I will be careful,” he replied sounding as assuring as he could. “I won’t call or text him, so don’t worry about that.”

“I know you won’t,” she muttered. “However, I know you will stare at that phone, begging for it to ring again.”

“Guilty as charged.”

“I would kill him if I could,” admitted Lily with a slight amusement to her voice. “ _If_ he calls, I’m _not_ saying he will, keep your shit together.”

“I will.”

“Talk to you soon _Moony._ ”

“Not you too, Lils!” protested Remus, he hated that stupid nickname.

“I’m mad at you, so yes, me too,” she laughed and she hung up. 

She was right, well Lily was mostly always right even though the boys chose to ignore it. What Sirius did after New Years Eve, let alone being disappointing and heart breaking, was rude but Remus couldn’t help but feel like he was keeping something to himself, as he does. Sirius Black wasn’t an open book even though he would insist he is. He had so many words out of order, foot notes, coffee spills on his unfinished pages and some of them were completely torn out. Even if he was an open book he was unreadable in just six days. 

* * *

Sirius held his phone tight in his hand, undecided about what to do, he was just weighing his options for the hundredth time that afternoon.

“Have some balls Black.”

“Text or call?” he asked Marlene. “I just feel like texting is insincere but I’m not sure if I can talk if I’m on the phone with him.”

“Then text him,” she said impatiently. “Not too long, concise and to the point. Apologise properly and then wait for him to reply desperately.”

“I’m not des--”

“Don’t even try.”

“You’re right,” grinned Sirius as he opened a chat with Remus and started typing. 

After retyping the same message three times and making Marlene proof the the same thing five times, Sirius was ready to hit the send button. 

“I can’t, send it for me.”

It all happened so fast. As soon as Sirius finished the sentence, Marlene grabbed his phone hit the small plane shaped button and gave the phone back.

“There you go,” she winked and Sirius was just gaping at the phone screen.

* * *

Remus turned around so fast he almost broke his neck when he heard his phone buzz. The screen was lit up with one notification on it.

_New message from Sirius Black_

"Fuck."

 


	15. you've got mail

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I went into the genre I'd like to call horny fluff with Jily, not very much NSFW but still thought I'd give a warning.

Remus got a hold of his phone with wet hands and dried them off on his pants as he tried to get a grip. 

 _Thank God, Lily said don’t get excited or else I might have fainted,_ he thought to himself. He slid the notification to the right and entered his password after two wrong guesses, trembling hands and touch screens didn’t work well.

_Hey Remus I just wanted to apologise for last night I know I shouldn’t have called you at all and I’m absolutely sorry for waking you up at 3 in the morning. I have no idea what I said and I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable, I was just regretting some of the choices I made I think, you know how I say what comes to my mind when I’m drunk. Please don’t feel obligated to reply to this and once again I’m sorry._

“ _You know how_ I say what comes to my mind when I’m drunk?!?!”

Remus was walking up and down his small living room, clutching the phone like it was his lifeline.

“YOU KNOW HOW—” he yelled out. “That son of a _bitch_.”

He felt so angry but he had also a small curl to his lip. _Regretting some choices? You better, you wanker._

He looked at the phone again, frantically searching for Lily’s phone, he didn’t have the experience to deal with this alone, this required professional help. The phone rang a few times before Lily finally picked it up.

“Lily?”

“Yeah?” said Lily, her voice a little too excited. “He called, didn’t he?”

“Nope,” replied Remus, hoping she couldn’t hear the stupid happiness to his voice. “He texted and you _need_ to hear this.”

He put Lily on speaker and read the message out loud, she gasped a few times and had a few things to say about Sirius, his family got involved several times and Remus just snickered.

“What are you gonna do?”

“That’s why I called you Lils,” protested Remus, he had no idea how to deal with this. “I’m pretty sure he has seen the ‘blue tick’, I’m cool with it he can wait.”

Lily didn’t even replied to that knowing Remus better than he did himself.

“No, I can’t,” he gave up. “He has seen the ‘blue tick’ now I have to reply.”

“You are an idiot.”

“Oi, it’s called a heartbreak,” laughed Remus, he wasn’t sure why he was so anxious about this but his heart rate hadn’t slowed down one bit the past 15 minutes. “Game plan?”

“Won’t you do whatever the fuck you want anyways?” teased Lily, she knew him too well.

“Well,” he began, taking a deep breath. “Not this time, because if I do what I want, you will get really pissed.”

“Still pining, Moony?”

“I never got to taste him,” objected Remus jokingly. “Makes him ten times more appealing and you _saw_ him, he is a fucking greek god.”

“And then he pissed me off,” she replied with that familiar scolding tone she had. “At least don’t look so desperate.”

“Evans!”

“ _What?”_ she said innocently. “If that’s what makes you happy, if he genuinely is what you think he is, go for it Rem and if he breaks your heart again, I _will_ break his legs.”

“I’m glad you got my back,” smiled Remus. “That wanker boyfriend of yours would never do that.”

“I heard that!” yelled James from the other side. 

“Is it a lie?”

“I mean,” answered James sounding a little unsure now. “He was gonna get me tickets to the FA Cup Final.”

“Ugh, Potter,” said Lily and Remus felt her roll her eyes, there was scrambling noises coming from the other side of the phone.

“Oh- OW EVANS, that hurt,” shouted James, Lily was probably running after him in the house after that snarky comment. “Stop, trying. to. kick. me. YOU ARE FIVE FOOT NOTHING EVANS”

“I’m gonna hang up now,” laughed Remus.

“Yeah, sure,” panted Lily, that must have been one fight. “Love you, Moony”

“Love you, too, redhead.”

* * *

 

“Oh Potter, you shouldn’t have dragged my height into this,” laughed Lily as she tried to catch her boyfriend over the sofa and she threw the phone away carelesslyç

“But you are so... what’s the word?” James waited for a moment before continuing, pushed his glasses up his nose and grinned. “Ah, yes. _Tiny_.”

“POTTER!”

“I _love_ it when you call my name,” he teased with a smirk on his face and a raised eyebrow. Lily was trying not to get caught up on his face because that was how she always lost these stupid fights. 

The way his mouth curled, the way his eyebrow shot up so effortlessly, his dark skin so flawless and soft and ... _no._  She climbed up the sofa to attack the taller boy but his old reflexes were still in place and he had grabbed her by the waist and was now holding her from just below her thighs just so she can wrap his legs around his waist but Lily Evans never gave up without a fight, so for now she just dangled her feet.

“I love that you are tiny, Lils,” said James with a smile on his face, not the teasing one, the one that made Lily feel at home. “Let’s kiss and make up?”

“No,” said Lily as she tried to break free but he was too strong for him and when James buried his face in her neck she let out an involuntary laugh. “That’s not fair.”

“You smell like flowers,” he continued as he placed a soft, wet kiss on Lily’s neck that made her gasp a little bit. “I’ll never get over how beautiful you are even when we are old and grumpy.”

His eyes were so intense, Lily felt like he was being drawn into a blackhole.

“And this is how you get away with everything, you git,” she said as she wrapped her legs around James’ waist. She let her fingers get tangled in his messy locks before she leant in to give a small kiss to his boyfriend. “Now let me down.”

“Oh, I don’t think so,” grinned James as he made her jump a little to get a better grasp of her, his hand were so familiar on Lily’s legs and she could feel his grip get a little bit tighter, just the right amount.

James had a way with Lily, it was like magic. When he tilted his head just a little bit she was already hearing her own heart beats and it was soft but hungry kisses, his hair brushing on Lily’s forehead and it was so hard to breathe, when his grip got a bit tighter, she let out a moan, he just knew everything about her now. The power she gave to him was ridiculous, but he was ridiculous, too. It was the way he knew just the right time to slide his tongue in, the way they were in such harmony with eyes closed. He had started walking and without hesitation Lily knew where they were going and soon enough she felt the wooden door behind her. James kept her pinned to the door as his hands cupped her cheek ever so softly making Lily want to go mad, now his fingers were in her hair tugging gently and her back arched making him smile, she could feel it on her lips. 

“James, the door,” she whispered barely.

“No,” he objected and he was pulling her hair a bit harder exposing her neck to him. He trailed down with the softest of kisses, her jawline, her neck and nibbing at her collarbones making Lily hum happily. She loved that James took his time with her but sometimes she just wanted him to throw her on the bed already.

“ _Potter_.”

His hands were trailing up and down her arched back and it was about time, he would just open the bloody door. She tried finding the door knob as he was busy making her go crazy but her hand was pinned above her in a matter of seconds. 

“Jamie,” she begged. “The door, please.”

“I told you I loved it when you said my name,” smirked James as he pinned her against to wall harder with his hips and Lily barely kept herself contained however James didn’t, his eyes locked on hers like the world would end if he didn’t. Lily tried throwing her head back but she didn’t have much space, so she just closed her eyes and licked her lips, two could play this game. He took a deep breath and Lily’s top was gone in the flash of an eye. Lily freed her hand and put them on his boyfriend’s shoulders, her fingers softly trailing his shoulder muscles, God she was thankful for all the sports he did and as James continued his teasing, Lily dug her fingernails in his skin just a little bit, making sure he knows if she is going down, he is coming with her and the small grin he gave as he reached for the door handle confirmed Lily’s expectations.

When he slowly let her down to the bed, Lily wiggled out of jeans as James took his t-shirt off, there he was in all his glory the bloody idiot that stole her heart and Lily Evans smiled to herself, enjoying the view before he caught her by the legs and pulled her towards him.

“A little too excited aren’t we?” he asked with that stupid smile on his face, his eyes shining with mischief.

“Shut it and just lose the pants Potter,” she ordered and James just raised an eyebrow before he landed a kiss on her inner thigh. 

“No, I think I will enjoy this a little more,” he said as his hands roamed around her legs. “Just for making me run around the house, you know?”

“James Potter, you-- _oh_ ,” cried Lily before she could help herself and bit her lip before she let her boyfriend take full control, God knew he knew what he was doing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Jily part got a little out of hand, sorry(?)


	16. small world

"So, Mar," began Sirius with his whiskey glass in his hand. "Can I call you Mar?"

"Go 'head," answered Marlene, her words slurring a little bit.

"No reply."

"No reply, mate," repeated Marlene. “Granted you said he didn’t have to reply.”

"The fuck am I going to do now?" asked Sirius as he threw himself on the couch next to Marlene who had her glass of whiskey in one hand and a Sirius' phone in the other. "Do I go knock on his door?"

"First of all you don’t know where his house is," she pointed out. "Second of all, no, you don't. We may be drunk but you are going to give him some space. You alie- alien- what the bloody hell was that word?"

"Alienated?"

"Yes," she confirmed. "That one. You _a-li-en-at-ed_ him. Jesus, that's one hell of a word."

"And you are drunk."

"That, too," smiled Marlene as she put her glass down on the coffee table in front of her, she then turned to face Sirius. "You need to be patient with him. You cannot force him to forgive you. Forgiveness takes time and he deserves that time after you literally abandoned him."

"Stop rubbing it in my face," protested Sirius but he knew she was right. “So we just… wait?”

“And drink.”

And they shot their glasses just as a phone buzzed indication one of them received a text. They both reached for their phones with lightning speed hoping at least one of they can get what they want from tonight.

“UGH,” shouted Marlene. “It’s just Lily.”

“Lily?”

“A good friend of mine from college,” she responded. “I said I would meet with her tomorrow. We don’t meet a lot, schedule issues, but we have our monthly gossip get together and it was tomorrow and I’m shitfaced.”

“Remus had a friend named Lily,” reminisced Sirius. “They were quite good friends. I think he first met James—“

“James?!” yelled Marlene even though they were sitting next to each other. “As in James _I’m-awesome-and-I-have-the-ego-of-Narcissus_ Potter?”

“Kinda sounds like the James I met,” said Sirius with his eyes growing double the size. “Are you saying… you know the friends of _my_ Remus?”

“I think I am,” laughed Marlene. “Oh, Lily _hates_ you for sure.”

“Why?” asked Sirius with concern in his voice.

“You hurt her friend,” she explained. “She doesn’t like it when someone hurts her friends and that girl can hold a grudge.”

“Oh for fucks’ sake,” exclaimed Sirius as he rolled her eyes. “Maybe I was wrong, maybe we are not meant to be with Remus.”

“You meeting me in a godforsaken bar is not a good enough sign for you?” grinned Marlene. “The world is small Sirius Black but not _that_ small.”

“Maybe I should come to your meeting with redhead tomorrow?”

“Nope,” objected Marlene. “Definitely not. Give all of them some space and don’t use his friends to get to him, that’s low.”

“I’m used to playing dirty,” smirked Sirius and this time his phone buzzed and the screen showed a message from Remus. He stared at the screen, read the name 5 times to be sure and the silently shoved to phone to Marlene’s face.

“Oh shit,” she gasped. “Why would you close your message previews?!”

“Old habits,” answered Sirius. “Mother was nosey.”

“Read it.”

“I can’t.”

“I said, read it.”

“Let’s wait a few minutes.”

“Let’s fucking not.”

Sirius slid the notification to the right and slowly entered his password, fearing what reply he might have gotten. Marlene quite literally climbed on top of him so that she can read it, too.

_No worries, Sirius. However I would rather get sober calls from you then drunk ones since it’s been four months since we last talked. Hope you’re doing okay._

“He dragged you to the pits of hell,” said Marlene with mischievous smile. “But he also replied which is a good sign.”

“This in short means have some—“

“Balls, yes,” completed Marlene. “I like him, sounds like a fun guy.”

“He is too kind to say it outright,” smiled Sirius at the phone. “So he decided to shove it down my throat like a sword. It’s fine. I’m fine.”

“So what are you going to say?”

“About that,” read out loud Sirius as he was typing the message. “Is it possible for us to meet some time you are available. I would like to apologise to you face to face for my mistake.”

“Don’t say _mistake_ ,” suggested Marlene as she put her hair in a loose bun. “It’s too political. I’m too drunk to think this straight, what is this?”

“Stupidity?” asked Sirius as she laughed at Marlene’s remark. They were both too drunk to be doing this but it was fine.

“Yes, perfect.”

_About that… Is it possible for us to meet some time you are available? I would like to apologise to you face to face for my stupidity._

“Aaand, sent,” announced Sirius as he put the phone down and grabbed their glasses to fill them with golden liquid again. “After this we should probably sleep.”

“We will whether we want it or not,” pointed out Marlene while looking down at her phone. “What am I going to do about Dorcas?”

“Oh, that’s her name,” exclaimed Sirius as he sat down next to his new blonde best friend. “Tell me everything.”

“Where do I even begin, Black?” she sighed, her eyes focusing on the painting behind Sirius. “Where do I even begin?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't get your hopes up, it might take another five months for the next update.  
> I'm so sorry but thank you for your patience.  
> I hope you liked brotp Blackkinnon!


	17. alliance

Sirius woke up to the sun in his eyes, they had fallen asleep on the couch in the worst position possible and Sirius could feel his back aching and his body begging for some water. He gently pushed Marlene away who was still holding her phone like lifeline, waiting for a message from Dorcas.

She had told their story the night before, it wasn’t as bad as it seemed but it was hard all with Dorcas being in the US for her masters and Marlene having to stay back. Sirius had grown fond of the blonde haired bombshell, she had been a good way to fill the whole Regulus had left in his life. He was very happy for Reg but in times like this, he needed his sensibility in his life, he was always better at taking decisions than Sirius was. Reg was the smarter one for sure even though their parents had pointed out several times that studying arts were for idiots.

Sirius walked to the kitchen grabbed the glass bottle from the fridge and chugged it without bothering to pour the water into a glass. Then he checked his watch to see it was 11 am.

“Mar,” he said softly and Marlene grunted as a reply. “You have to get up to meet Lily.”

“5 minutes more.”

“Marlene,” he said this time with his normal voice. “It’s 11 am and you have a lunch date with her. You  _have_  to shower and maybe go get changed at your place?”

“Nah,” she said as she blinked slowly. Then she rubbed her eyes. “I do have to shower but I can just go with what I wore to the bar it’s fine.”

“Whatever you say,” chuckled Sirius at the nonchalance of Marlene. Anyone who had seen her would say she was high maintenance but the more Sirius got to know her, he realised her appearance wasn’t very representative of who she was and that maybe, most probably, he was a spoiled brat with prejudices about people based on how they look but that wasn’t important at the moment. 

* * *

Lily was sitting inside the cafe patiently waiting for her idiot of a friend to show up. Marlene had the tendency to be at least 30 minutes late to anything they planned so Lily had taken measures this time. She had said 1230 instead of 1 pm and arrived at 1 pm.  _A girl’s gotta know her best friend, right?_  she thought to herself, congratulating herself on the precaution she took.

In a few minutes the unmistakeable blonde hair of Marlene was visible outside of the cafe. Lily got up to greet her friend with a huge smile on her face.

“Ah, I missed you!”

“I missed you, too redhead,” she hugged her back. “Excuse this mess, I haven’t been home in two days.”

“What?” said Lily with a surprised tone. “Why?”

“Don’t get your panties in a bunch,” she brushed away. “I was staying at a  _friend’s_.”

“And..”

“That you _may_  know...”

“Marlene, I swear to g--”

“You never let me do dramatic reveals,” she threw her hands up in protest. “I was with Sirius Black.”

“The fuck?” gasped Lily and Marlene had to shush her. “ _The_  Sirius Black?”

“I don’t think there are many people with a name as ridiculous as that, Lils,” snickered Marlene. “We met at a bar when I was moping about Dorcas and he was moping about Remus, was it?”

“You’ve  _met_ Remus?!”

“ _Ugh_  Lils,” she said and rolled her eyes. “You know I’m not good with names.”

“Tall, lanky, blondish, slight Welsh accent?”

“OHHHHH!”

“You idiot,” laughed Lily. “What have you been doing with that asshole?”

“Okay,” began Marlene, getting inexplicably defensive of her new friend. “In his defense he was protecting Remus. I know he is an idiot but I promise he is a nice person.”

“I know that,” said Lily angrily. “You know how I hate it when my friends get heartbroken. You know I’m still on the edge about Dorcas, too.”

“Lily,” she scolded. “We talked about this, it’s not her fault. It will work out some day, it’s fine. So tell me, had Potter gotten his head out of his ass?”

“No, he hasn’t proposed yet,” replied Lily as she shook her head. “What is your rush? I’m not in a rush, neither is he.”

“I need something to keep me busy until Dorcas returns,” she admitted as she looked at the menu. “And a wedding is a really good distraction.”

“They have amazing vegan options here,” pointed out Lily as she skimmed the menu before returning to the subject at hand. “Why aren’t you trying to fix whatever is wrong before she comes back?”

“She said she needs some space,” said Marlene. “I am giving her what she asked for and I’m hoping it won’t blow up in my fucking face. I don’t even know what’s wrong anymore Lils and it’s eating me alive.”

“I can imagine babe,” she reassured. “I’m sorry, I hope it gets better.”

Right then a waiter arrived to take their orders and when they were finished Marlene turned to Lily with a glint to her eye.

“Did you hear that Longbottom and Alice got engaged?” she asked enthusiastically. “I saw the pictures on Instagram and it looked super cute. Potter better surpass that one.”

“Marlene!” protested Lily with a grin on her face. “Stop already with the wedding jokes.”

“Alright, alright...”

“Anyways, I did hear and I’m so happy for them,” she continued. “They are such a lovely couple, do you think they would invite us to the wedding?”

“I would get so mad if they didn’t,” teased Marlene but Lily knew that there was a truth to her joke. Marlene always cared for little things like that. “We were all in that stupid club together after all.”

“Emmeline Vance moved to Valencia with a Spanish hottie,” Lily remembered. “That place looks amazing with all that sun. Don’t get me wrong I love London but--”

They both glumly looked out the window at the rain that was pouring.

“You know what I mean,” smiled Lily at her friend.

“Oh, I do.”

They enjoyed their food reminiscing about the old times and their friends for a good while. They were drinking their coffee when a mischievous smile formed on Marlene’s face.

“I know that smile,” said Lily. “What are you thinking about?”

“I’m thinking we should help Remus and Sirius get together,” she suggested and Lily frowned. “I know you are mad at Black but come on Lily, you know Remus cares about him.  _Please?_ ”

“I don’t know Mar--”

“You know those two idiots won’t be able to do it on their own,” reminded Marlene patiently. “You  _know_  it.”

“You have a point there,” accepted Lily but she was still thinking about whether she should meddle or not. “I just don’t want to see Remus get hurt again.”

“I promise Sirius is too much in love to hurt him again.”

“He _is_?”

“Hopelessly.”

“Oh lord,” said Lily as she played with her red hair. “I think I’m going to regret this but let’s do it.”

“Yes!” celebrated Marlene as she threw her fists up. “Finally a good distraction.”

“How do we do it?”

“It’s Peter’s birthday next week, right?” queried Marlene and took a sip from her coffee.

“It... is...”

“So this is what I’m thinking...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw the 4k hits and I was able to write something small with no outline whatsoever.  
> I swear to god this story is going wherever I take it when I'm writing it, I don't even know where it's going this is so much fun.  
> no it's not I'm kidding, it's tiring lol
> 
> anyways I hope you guys liked a bit of Evans-McKinnon alliance! Let's see what happens.


	18. texting II

**_[Marlene & Lily]_ **

M: You haven't chickened out, have you?

L: I do NOT chicken out mar

M: Urm.. sure

L: whAT does that mean?!

M: Nothing :)

L: You know I hate that :) thing

M: I do :)

L: I hate you

M: I know

* * *

**_[who run the world]_ **

_Marlene changed the group name to "Mission Black Wolf"_

M: what does that mean?

M: black wolf?

Mar: you know sirius black and our friend wolf son of wolf remus lupin

Mar: you were the one who told me his name is literally wolf wolf

Mar: jesus

Mar: anyways

Mar: we have to solve this sirius remus issue at peter's birthday

M: no we don't

M: it's pete's birthday

Mar: and??

M: it's HIS day

L: it still will be M

M: you're in on this?! ,

L: i just want to see Rem happy?

M: you're drawn to drama like a moth drawn to flame Lils

L: am not

M: how long did it take for mar to convince you

Mar: 2 min tops

M: you're weak @Lily

D: what the hell it's the middle of the night

L: nothing dorcas, go back to sleep

D: m's right lils you do love drama

L: i don't

M: sure anyways what's the plan mar?

D: so it's full on coincidence that potter is more dramatic

L: i'm not having this convo

L: @Marlene what's the plan

D: that's what i thought lol

D: anyways if this is a mission group let me back in once you're done, yeah?

_Dorcas has left to Mission Black Wolf_

L: you could just mute us?

L: aaand she's out

M: mar are you alive

Mar: not to be dramatic or anything but yes, barely

Mar: fucking hell

Mar: have any of you ever had cardiac arrest?

L: deeeeep breaths hun

L: huh huh huh huh

Mar: anyways voice note coming

Mar: listen carefully because it is VERY simple for once

_Marlene sent a voice note to to "Mission Black Wolf"_

L: mar this is five minutes long

Mar: the first two minutes is just me regulating my breath and rambling incoherently

Mar: sorry

L: ah that’s fine

M: listened to it

M: it sounds doable

M: but he is going to kill us all

L: we’re fucked

* * *

**_[James & Lily]_ **

J: lils

J: lily

J: evans

J: soon to be potter

L: what

J: what

L: “soon to be potter”??

J: well wouldn’t you?

L: you’re being weird

L: I mean weirder than usual

J: I just wanted to ask if you heard the plan

L: it’s crazy and rem will kill us

L: you mean that one?

J: I think it’s genius but yes we’ll all be dead by the end of it

L: I swear I would never want to be on the other side of a plan made by you and mar

J: she’s a smart gal

L: if we get through this shit without remus deciding to murder us all

L: I might agree

J: it will be fine

L: you said that before the prank you pulled last year in high school

L: you almost got expelled in addition to almost losing your left eye

J: damn woman

J: I thought we weren’t bringing that one up anymore

L: what can I say

J: love you

L: love you too see you in a few hours

* * *

**_[what’s new pussycat]_ **

_James sent a screenshot to what’s new pussycat_

J: i got excited and almost fucked up

R: bloody idiot

P: jesus christ prongs

P: you don’t even have the fucking ring

J: i know i know

J: but i made up my mind 

J: haven’t i

R: ohh yes

R: progress

J: i don’t like your tone rj lupin

R: what got you so excited anyways

J: nothing

J: i was just being my usual annoying self

R: you’re being weird

R: more than usual that is

P: nope

P: seems just the right amount to me

J: fuck both of you

* * *

**_[Peter & James]_ **

P: i swear if you manage to fuck up two surprises at once

P: i will kill you before lils has the chance

P: and probably frame someone for it

J: this is too MUCH

P: no it’s not for any normal person

J: i have to GET IT OUUUTT

P: james i swear

J: okay okay

J: calm your tits

P: i will once you start acting like a normal adult

J: boring

P: don’t blow it

J: got it captain

* * *

**_[Lily & Marlene]_ **

L: I think all is set

L: james is wayyy too excited

M: so it’s just me she wants distance from

M: she is all fine and giddy with you

L: aw hun no

L: if you had written something maybe she would have replied

M: I doubt it

L: mar don’t give up hope yet

M: I’m tired and I just want to have some closure at least if this is how it’s going to be

L: she didn’t say anything though

M: well that’s the problem innit

M: she was more than happy to joke with you

M: just not me

M: anyways

L: want me to talk to her?

M: no

L: okay

M: I’m not going to tell sirius about the plan

M: because he is an idiot and he’ll probably ruin it

L: yeah I agree

L: just invite him without giving away too much

M: right away ma’am

L: let me know if you want to talk babe

M: meh

M: I’ll be fine

* * *

**[Marlene & Sirius]**

M: oi

S: hey there

M: so I talked with the lads and you’re invited to peter’s birthday this weekend

M: promise we are fun

M: and I’ll get you whiskey

S: wouldn’t remus be mad

M: no it’s sorted

M: he’s a big boy after all

S: and lily?

M: it took slightly longer but she said she’ll behave

S: sure then

S: you’ll let me know when and where

M: will do

S: should i bring something

M: nope

M: just yourself :)

S: what does :) mean

M: nothing it’s just a happy face

S: that’s never just a happy face mar

M: omg

M: for me it is

S: ok

M: ttyl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise?  
> i had to edit this 5 times because emojis fuck ao3 up apparently  
> jesus christ


End file.
